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I had a shower built in my house for my dad's arrival home.. The dogs have had more baths than my dad.. There are 4 strategically-placed grab-bars, exactly where he said to put them, and a bench.. But he is terrified to shower even though someone is always there w/ him.. Help..?!

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I wish I could get my Mom into the shower but cant anymore, been there though. I would talk to her loud, clear and slowly as I suds her up, "oh remember when you made me go to swimming lessons and I hated it, well I am so happy you made me go!" etc etc they Love to hear good things about themselves and compliments! If hes like my Mom, they have one-track minds and you can bathe as you are talking to him. Their mind is so onto the story that it goes well. I let Mom hold a small towel or facecloth and sometimes I would sing stories about her, making them up as I went. Sometimes I made up gossip about the neighbors, anything!! If all else fails , go with the Hymns or Christmas songs, they all remember them. I put on the water long before we got in and had her feel it to see if it was ok. She hated very warm or too cool, it had to be just right for her to accept it. I had a chair in there and a shower wand so I kept the water low, suds her up and rinsed, over and over. Remember if you feel stressed they have fantastic emotional sensing now and they will be stressed too, be calm and it will go better.Good luck, keep talking haha, hope this helps.
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We had an OT when he was released from rehab.. She was awesome, but he didn't like her, mostly because of discussions about the shower.. He has bouts of C Diff, and while I would like to skip the showers, they are a necessity to keep him clean.. He has a difficult time communicating "why" on just about everything.. We just keep guessing..
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my mother passed away at age 81 back in august and she politely told me that she is not fond of getting wet. she kept herself washed quite well as she had for years by washing herself at the lavatory or adult wipes. she showered about 5 times in her last year. daily baths / showers werent the reality in the 1930s and 40s, for chrissake they drew water from a spring in the hillside..
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Have the doctor prescribe an Occupational Therapist who can teach him how to safely bathe. Discuss his fear with his MD, and see if medications need to be changed, deleted or added to overcome his fear. At the very least you need to identify exactly what it is he is fearing: Falls? Scalds? Skin too dry? and make adjustments.
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