My mother passed away two weeks ago. I am a co-executor as well. Mother's well doesn't mention any of the gifts he has made. He says mother told him to do it. The money and jewelry all went to his old girl friends and people that work for him now or use to. Mother never told me about these gifts and we talked about everything right up to her death. I saw this co-executor nearly every day for the last 8 months when mother was in and out of the hospital and he never mentioned any of this to me either until he says the gifts were all made. There is nothing in writing that I know of either. Mother's will was really simple. All of her property was to be split evenly between my brother, my son, and my self.
Who's handling any asset inventory?
Lots of people make bequests that they don't formally include in their wills. Sometimes it can be as simple as telling someone that they may have an item "someday", often for as little a reason as they admired it. Sometimes people laboriously label every knickknack with the intended recipient's name. And sometimes families squabble over every penny, switching labels and hauling off truckloads of possessions they haven't any use for just to keep someone else from having it.
The issue of the jewellery is probably not about the value of it - it may have a substantial emotional attachment - a cheap locket with hair of your only child may have great significance to you but not to anyone else whereas a diamond held in a bank may have considerable monetary value and may have no emotional tie at all.
And that is why the terms of the will have to be adhered to UNLESS SHE HAD IT WRITTEN AS A CODICIL, in which case it becomes part of the will I suggest you google probate for dummies where it explains that as GA said that as part of the probate process expenses have to be handled first before distribution of assets
Regardless, I think this person has acted in very poor taste and you deserve an explanation. The two of you should be working together; that other person needs to recognize that and get on board and learn how to work as a team.
I am in awe!
M88
I also have the same question as RM - how did this person gain access to such valuable jewelry? I would think they would have been locked in a safe in your mother's home, or in a safety deposit box. And how did you become aware of these acts, how long have you known about it, and what have you done to stop him? Have you considered an injunction?
Something's amiss here.
Mulatta, aw, shucks! I'm just sharing what I learned over the years.
I hope this narrative sort of answers some of the question that have been raised. My mother was not mentally well. Her doctor saw evidence that she had had as many as 16 mini-strokes. Her memory was slipping badly. She would tell the same story over and over again, 15 minutes after she had already told it. The co-executor and I talked about her state of mind many times. Other than the 30k that he paid himself for taking mother to the doctors and helping in other small ways, I don't think his actions have been selfish or malicious. He was just trying to make the world align with the way he thought it should be. I do think he has violated his fiduciary responsibilities and certainly betrayed me, my son, my wife, and my older brother.
Hmmmm.....I smell rolls baking in the oven.
If the appointment language names them and indicates that they act jointly, then they must concur on actions.