My mother, almost 75, is getting ready for an anterior (and posterior) approach cervical fusion. She has bad osteoporosis, and the dr says because of this he will have to go from both sides. She’s also seeing a sports med dr to start medicine for the osteoporosis. Surgeon says she’ll go to rehab for a few weeks after, due to her legs already being weak.
Also, I’d posted about her being estranged, mentally ill, house hoarded etc. Elder lawyer says I must get immediate POA (currently only have springing) or walk away. We’ve been working on getting her ready for surgery, cardiac clearance etc. Osteo doc is last step. After this weeks visit I plan to have the difficult POA discussion. We’ve also been getting her house cleaner, utilities current etc.
So, with her mental issues plus prior history of delerium in the hospital, I predict this will be awful.
Im trying to be as prepared as possible for anything. What sort of clothing and how much do we pack for rehab? Label with her name? Best way to do that? Does rehab wash their clothes?
I honestly predict she’ll be too mentally whacked to cooperate and they will kick her out.
Her laundry is still sort of all over the house , and I’ll prob just buy her stuff and wash it and pack at my house. Her place also just doesn’t smell good and her clothes smell like that.
The hanging sets in the closet is a good idea.
Mom is still considered competent. She’s actually improved since she got out of the hospital in October. Her PCP has her on B12 to correct a deficiency. That said, no amount of B12 will fix her major depression (with psychotic features imho), anxiety, lying, and narcissism. But her life is more stable and also better since she’s no longer overmedicated with a plethora of opiates, muscle relaxers, etc. She was taken by EMS twice last year for opiate overdose. Neighbor says she was outside naked and this is also in her medical record.
move been going to her psych NP w her who also feels this was over medication.
I think this surgery will destabilize what I’ve spent months working on. Sigh.
I’m glad that you were able to find suitable clothes at Walmart. I don’t blame you for shopping for inexpensive sale items to go to rehab in.
I hope that your mom does well in rehab. It’s tiring for them but my mom did improve.
They will update the family at her care meeting. In our case, everyone was present, the occupational and physical therapists. They said mom participated and worked hard but would benefit from a few extra days of rehabilitation. Mom paid out of pocket for the additional days. The rest was covered by her insurance.
Name on everything. I had custom iron-on tags made for my mom's clothes, because most places just try to write their names on the tags with a laundry marker, and it washes out or is just too hard to read. I ironed on those tags and sewed them in, too. (Round out the sharp corners, or they itch.) Get them from Amazon.
Make sure mom doesn't take anything to rehab she wouldn't mind 'losing' and without a question, no jewelry!!!!! I know a lot of women would rather cut off a finger than remove their wedding rings, but they can easily slip off and be lost for good. No earrings either. The less you take with her, the less to lose.
JoAnn's idea of hanging 'sets' of clothing in the closet is great. No decisions, just grab a 'set' and get going. That would also help to see if she's getting showers/bed baths--by the way the clothes 'move through' the system.
I'd start working on getting that PoA in order sooner rather than later. My mom was thrilled to 'dump' a lot of her life decisions on the 2 brothers who were her reps. Not everyone is thrilled to hand that over.
I would not buy Mom new clothes. Wash what she has. Soak them for a little while, (I found Tide oringinal gets out smells) throw a cup or two of vinegar in the wash. Like said, comfortable clothing. I think therapy likes sneakers but you can call them. Get iron on laundry tape and put her name inside where the tags are. You do her clothes. I would say have 5 to 7 outfits. Always leave one or two sets when u do her laundry. I kept Moms in sets. I ended up having to hang her bra with the sets. Only one pair of shoes. I would leave any jewelry she wears at home. She is going to have to take it off for surgery anyway.
If your POA is Springing and the doctor feels Mom is not competent to make decisions, then he can put it in effect. If you need more than one doctor to sign off, I am sure the doctor can help u there. If Mom is considered incompetent, then she can't change the POA to immediate.
"She’s also seeing a sports med dr to start medicine for the osteoporosis." Be careful about medicines for osteoporosis. It has been found that those every 6 months, once a year treatments were causing brittle bones and women were getting fractures much easier. So its a catch 22, your either going to get a fracture from the osteo or the brittle bones. Me, I rather not take the med. But seems your Mom has very bad osteoporiosis.
Also, do her laundry if you can. Rehab laundry will lose a lot of it, even if it's labeled.
My mom was very stylish but I made sure that mom had comfortable clothes to wear to rehab.
Since you are buying your mom new clothes, I would keep it simple. Buy for comfort. Yes, do mark your mom’s name on her clothes. You can use a sharpie or a fabric marker. Or you can order labels from Amazon.
I was told to place signs in my mom’s room if I was going to do the laundry. I chose to do my mom’s laundry for her and I did place a large sign and housekeeping didn’t notice it.
My mom had a fit because one of her favorite blouses was missing. I went down to the laundry area and found her blouse for her. These things occasionally happen.
My mother did well in rehab.
Wishing you and your mom all the best.