My client is a TALKER, from 7a.m. when she gets up to 10 p.m. when she goes to bed. There is never silence.

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I am not exaggerating. I have to make eye contact with her whenever she is talking, I cannot look away or she ask, what are you thinking? I thought you are here for my company. I have NOOO time for myself, not even my activity sheet I cannot write up. I will be in my room doing it she comes in asks, are you doing your homework? Do you take classes? Then she sits on my bed and the chatter begins, the repetitiveness is driving me crazy. The same thing all day nonstop, I am so tired of answering the same question over and over, then she says, my memory. She boastfully says, I am a talker, I cannot curb it. Any advice how to deal with this, she just loves to talk, if I do not respond she says, I thought you were here for my company, if you don't to be here you can go ..HELP, HELP.

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Yeah, it sounds like you've tried everything you know to do and she just won't stop talking. And we don't have any workable solutions either. If her kids like you, maybe be brutally honest with them and see if they'd consider getting her checked out by a doctor to prescribe some anti-anxiety meds to see if those might help. If the answer is no, then look for work somewhere else. I don't know how anyone could handle that constant, repetitive chatter all day, every day. I surely couldn't.
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This occurred to me too - she might have undiagnosed anxiety, and sometimes meds can work wonders. Can you suggest that her kids take her in for a checkup and they can mention this "symptom" to her doctor?
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I agree with looloo, doesn't sound like a good fit..move on and find a patient that's a better fit with your personality. Caregiving is hard enough as it is without the resentfulness! Some do good with dementia/Alzheimers, some can handle physical issues better.... we can't do it all alone!
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Rosie, I'm not a professional caregiver, but her symptoms of dementia just might not work with your own personality and abilities--which you should not apologize for. I don't think many people realize how crazy-making the constant chatter and repetitiveness can be, especially if you get NO respite. My own threshold for this is pretty low, but I can handle other things fine.
Also, I'd caution against showing increasing amounts of interest and curiosity with a personality like hers. Frankly, there are some people who are bottomless pits, and the more you give, the more they want. Sometimes noncommittal comments are best, like "Go on", "interesting", "sounds lovely", etc.
Could you split her care with someone else? Or find another client who is a better fit?
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Kathy11, thank you for your input, advice. I do interact with her by listening, asking questions, saying things. When she repeats her stories she then says. tell me about you. You married, you have children? I answer all those questions and add more. Before my last word she will say, you never talk about you. Tell me about you. It is soo annoying hearing the same things over and over, I will just answer a question she asked and she asks again. As she finishes a story she starts it over. Can you imagine from 7 AM to 10 PM hearing the same chatter over and over? There is NO SILENCE, never. It is too much, how much can one person take? She is my 26th client, 45 assignments, never came up on one like her.
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I have the same problem with my beloved Aunt. When she starts a story she must give all the background information to every person in the story. It used to drive me up the wall. My advice, become interested in the stories, ask questions, when people are heard and acknowledged, their need for attention subsides. Now forty years later, I am invested in these people's lives, and enjoy my time with the aunt. If this isn't possible, maybe gentle honesty would work.
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Eyerishlass,firstly I DID NOT say I stay in another room for peace n quiet or anything. Secondly, I am entitle to 8 hours of undisturbed sleep, 15 mins break for every 4 hrs worked, 30 mins per meal 3 times a day and ONE HOUR of UNDISTURBED personal time. So for YOUR information I know MY rights. I did not say I want to make her BE quiet, I am seeking HELP as how to deal with the situation.
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No, she is NOT interested in books, she said, I am not a reader. neither knitting, her kids got her an Ipad with music, movies. she use to knit they say, she is not interested in any of those things......The thing is, she recently lost her husband of 64 yrs, she is 93, her kids stay with her for some months but they have their lives. She talks about her husband, how he adored her, how she had a wonderful life, how she likes attention, she likes to feel important.. Says she is a doer, she likes to accomplish things so she doesn't nap as she says she is wasting time and time is short. Her kids takes her to Mass, to lunch, places. I take her for a walk 2 to 3 times per day buy as she returns she starts the talking repeating the same things over n over. I sing to her, dance with her, we hug, I rub her back. She has memory loss, kids say dementia but they don't tell her so SHE thinks nothing is wrong with her. Her license was taken away from her years now I hear and she laments about the doctor saying, " I cant drive because of my age". No matter what you engage her in, she ends up TALKING. She says," I am a talker, I cannot curb that". So any suggestions?
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Can you interest her in books, (books on tapes)= silence get her ear phones or movies she likes? It may may quite her down for a couple hours at a time at least....sounds as if she may be bored...does she like to knit, paint, sew anything that takes concentration? Can you give her projects while you do yours and explain we both need quite time?Good Luck!
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Could you get her to do some sort of activity with you like playing games or cards or putting together a puzzle...anything so that you don't just have to sit there and watch her talk. Or take her for a walk or listen to music...tell us more about her and what her situation is and maybe we'll have more suggestions. Does she have dementia? Can she be mobile (like you take her somewhere)? What does she talk about all day, every day? Tell us more.
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