I've finally managed to talk my 84 yo father into visiting an assisted living apartment next week. He's gotten more and more frail especially since my mom passed away earlier this year. I moved in with them both several years ago but now I can't take care of him and he certainly can't take care of himself. I hired a home health aide to come in 4 hours each day but the rest of the time I'm about it when I get home from work at a hospital nearby. I'm exhausted and depressed and finally lied to him and said I need to go out of town a few weeks and the doctor says he can't be alone anymore. He of course thinks he's fine but can hardly get out of the chair without help. Now the last three weeks he's had colitis with near constant diarrhea (house stinks) and I finally made the decision he has to go.
I found a very nice place nearby where he can have a nice 1br apt and they'll do care thru end of life so I'd never have to worry about the dreaded nursing home. He finally realized its a good idea and this house is to big and I need to just be a son not a caregiver. Of course I have to hope he doesn't change his mind!
Anyway some questions.
1. I have full poa, including medical, financial and mental health. Can I "make" him move if it comes to that? I know I can get his doctor to write he can't care for himself.
2. My biggest worry is him being taken advantage of. How can I ensure he won't change his poa or anything after he moves? He's so lonely he'd be an easy target for a swindler lady type I read about here. I manage everything now and I have a good paying career so I need to know I can continue to manage his affairs.
3. He sits around the house here waiting for me to get home (unfair). Have you noticed after moving to assisted living that the person makes friends? Right now he does nothing but my hope is he develops a social circle.
4. Do I need to get guardianship? What is involved with that?
Like I said my biggest worry is him being scammed or marrying some lady he thinks he loves because he's lonely. He has $$ so he is a potential target.