I am friends with a couple in their 80's. Wife has been diabetic for many years and was able to take care of herself as far a medication and diet until last year. She had several episodes (if that's the term) where her husband had to rush her to the hospital. Daughter-in-law, an RN has a friend at Social Services and tells her the husband can't take care of wife properly. He is a proud stubborn man who didn't want anyone saying he couldn't take care of her. He told social worker to get off his property - she came back with sheriff.
He got subpoened to court while wife was in rehab center where she fell out of a wheel chair and broke her hip. He went to court without an attorney and the judge appointed a lawyer to be both her guardian and conservator. He put her in a nursing home and proceeded to sell off their jointly owned property to pay $7k per month plus meds and whatever else. One day I visit she is comotose and other days she is wheeling herself to the dining room. She blames her husband for being there and wants to go home. Only son wouldn't agree to be guardian as he discouraged to do so by the daughter-in-law. My friend has a lawyer now and I have gotten involved but I am getting the idea that although he hired this lawyer to get her home, the lawyer is using me to keep him calm while he helps the court's lawyer sell of their property. There were other options than a nursing home but once the court appointed the lawyer, who by the way has never met his ward, her husband didn't even have the right to learn about her condition or medications or anything about her care until the new lawyer got him permission to learn these things. What are the chances of ever getting her home with a caregiver who looks after her exclusively. Nursing home caregivers have 15 patients each. She is getting more depressed by the day. It's like she has given up.