I have been married to my husband for 14 years. I am a nurse. Since that time, his mom who is now 88 has relied on me to take her to her doctor appts. and many other things "because you know what they're talking about". My husband and I are the ones who call her every day take her what she needs. She was widowed almost 6 years ago and is legally blind. She has 4 other children, two who live within 20 miles of her. I told my husband this morning "When your mother passes, we're going to have to learn how to have a life again" and he agreed. She lives in her own home and has home health come in once a week. My weekends are spent helping her get what she needs done. I don't mean to sound selfish, but I am tired. My husband is tired. We both work demanding jobs and have little time. We are at work early and usually have things to do for her after work. Church is twice on Sundays. None of her other children offer to help. One says "Thank you for taking care of Mother." Two live out of state. One doesn't talk to her due to a dispute a few months ago. When I mention anything about someone else helping her, she becomes defensive and takes up for her other children. To be honest. I just feel used. I am 55 y/o. I don't know what to do. She is in good physical health, but I can tell some dementia is setting in. She was to have gone for a mental health examination to determine if it was due to just aging or some sort of dementia. The lady at the doctor's office didn't make the appt b/c "you know at that age you begin to forget things". There is so much more to this story that I just can't get into. Just believe me when I say we're both tired. I have begun to set some boundaries. Last Saturday I told her "I will be by after lunch". I took her shopping, for a haircut and an ice cream cone and then I rode her around awhile. I told her "I will be able to do this some Saturdays, but if someone comes by during the week (granddaughters) think about letting them do some of this for/with you." At least it's a start. Her other children are not going to help. If they were, they would have at some point in the last 6 years.