Just wanted to start a discussion about this very important topic.
I have been married for nearly 18 years and adore my husband. The stress of looking after my parents (even though they are in an AL facility two miles down the road...big mistake...far too close) is wearing thin on the both of us.
My mother has become so damn needy its beyond annoying! All she wants is to be with family.
She wants me to bring her over to our home just to "hang out".
While this isn't an impossibility I honestly don't have time for it as she will expect me to visit with her. She won't just 'hang out'.
My dad continues to stay in the hospital for his depression but is improving.
I understand her neediness but its become a problem.
I am so stressed out on getting that daily phone call, taking mom to see dad, hearing her whine, never bothering to participate in anything at her facility, feeling sorry for herself ...now is rejecting the upgrade on her cable.
Tough love is much needed now as I must save my marriage. My husband is a gem but he can only last so long with this.
I actually thought about giving him a divorce to protect him from this nonsense but that was just my crazy thinking (shows you how far I am getting.)
I love him too much but I also love him too much to put him through this shit!
God knows how much longer it will rob us of a life.
And its just not fair to be honest! WTH? They had their life. They had their travel time, their homes, their fun. Where is our fun? Our travel?
I know I must get tough with this. I have even found them a better AL place with more activities 9 miles from us. Mom has become beyond silly. "I can't be that far from you all" but hey...living nearly 200 miles away for over 25 years was OK. Unreal.
Anyway, I have whined enough.
How do you cope with your parents and balance your marriage?