I'm a register nurse caring for my father-in-law but I don't know what the proper pay is. Any advice?

If your family were to hire outside help to do what you do they would be paid $20-$25/hour.

Here is one thing to think about if one is trying to decide whether to quit work to care for an aging parent.... on average if a working person quits work he/she will lose over the years between $285,000 and $325,000 which means loss of salary, plus net worth loss of the health insurance, loss of pension, loss of other benefits such as matching 401k, etc. [source: Reuters 5/30/12]

Would his children be willing to write you a check for $285,000 or $325,000, so that their father could remain in his own home and you care for him? Or pay you $38.40 hour [your hourly rate plus the benefits you lost] for the next 4 years?

As I posted on your wall, if you do write up a contract which really is a good idea, it needs to contain an escape clause about not being bound by it when his need exceed your ability as only one person to do deal with and that will happen.

$19.20 per hour seems perfectly legit to me. You'll have to estimate your taxes and pay them quarterly, I believe, if you treat this as self-employment. And you will have to pay the employment tax the the employer usually pays, so you might want to consider charging more.

But the factors that cmag & glad mention should be considered, too. Did you give up health insurance when you quit to take care FIL? How are you handling that now? You were making 19.20/hour, but probably had some other benefits you are losing out on. Can you afford that for the rest of FIL's life, or the part of it he can have in-home care?

If the family finds you requested pay too high, I think it would be best for them to find a lower-cost option than an RN, and for you to go back to earning well and getting benefits. Still visiting FIL often, and showing your love, but as a caring DIL, not as the caregiver.

If you do work out a deal and continue to care for him, be sure to have a contract in place. Not to do so would risk problems if he needs to apply for Medicaid.

Let us know how this works out for all of you.

All the questions magnum asked. Make sure you have a written agreement in place to protect yourself and him in case there may be any need for Medicaid. Is the payment going to come from the children or FIL's funds?

It's great that his children insist on paying you and you should be paid.

I must ask though. Why is this your job? Why don't they hire someone like a CNA to do this work and let you return to your previous job?

My dad has 3 CNAs with him 24/7 at his home and that is working fine right now.

I doubt they are going to be willing to pay you $19.20 per hour, but with you being a registered nurse that qualifies you for a higher wage.

When your FIL's Alzheimer's reaches the point where he needs 24/7 are they going to expect you to do that? What plans do they have for the long haul?

Are you married with your own family? How close to retirement are you? Do you have your own health insurance? How well set up are you for your own retirement? I think all of these practical questions need to be raised too.