Any advice on caring for an alcoholic, lying Dad?

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About 6 weeks ago I found my biological father after 43yrs. He left when I was 2. We talked for a couple of weeks on the phone, and one day he called me up and told me he was dying, and that the lady he was living with was kicking him out. I took my savings and drove to Missouri from NY and brought him to live with me. (I am the oldest of 14kid) He's lived here for a month, no money, as all his money is tied up in Missouri banks, he has no check book, or debit card, so I have paid for all his expenses this far. After bringing him here, I found out that all he told me is not true, he doesn't have cancer, and isn't dying as he claimed. He's an alcoholic and lies about everything and everyone. I don't know where to turn to get help with him. I found out recently that he hasn't bathed in over a year (hasn't here and been here a month) he's mad that I am finding out his lies and is now refusing food. The stress he is causing me is worrying my family. HELP PLEASE!!

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odllovesjdl you have a point there. It took me 3 months to get a court date, but I was granted temporary guardianship in one week (Ohio).
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So we went from April 7th with the father living with her for a month with no money and paying for ALL his expenses. Now on the 10th just three little days later MsBeth has taken over control of his money??? What money??? To now the 15th....five days later (two of which were on the weekend) MsBeth is now getting help through AA, Family Service's and has someone coming in to help...It is amazing that you were able to get appointments and help from Family services SO fast...The wheels must move faster in New York. You are so lucky. Amazing too with working 2-3-4 jobs that you had time to get all this squared away in such short order. Now the 24th (nine days later) back to square one? Wow! now three days later and He's gone...Whew!!! So the courts actually moved very fast as well...one thing I really do not understand is how can the courts order anyone to do anything unless there is a trial? The Judge read reports??? and spoke with a lady he used to live with....??? Wow all this happened in less than a month...goodness!!! NOPE I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU!! Good fairytale though.
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That's good news indeed. Sometimes even judges DO judge correctly.
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Well done. Good luck for the future
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GOOD NEWS!! He's gone. I had a lady come in from the county, he lied to her (THANKFULLY I told her the entire story and had witness' and notarized statements from everyone involved) she knew the truth before she even came to my home. (she talked to ALL family members who knew the story) and when she came in he told her I was mean to him, that my house was always dirty, I didn't feed him, and I took his money without him knowing. She told him well we better get you out of here immediately, he now is living in an adult center for elderly. And he has been court ordered to pay me $400.00 a month for all the expense's I gave out to help him. The judge told him (after reading all reports, seeing pictures, and hearing testaments from everyone) his lying put him where he's at and maybe when he tries to take advantage of his children again he should think twice. The judge asked the lady he was living with "did you kick him out or evict him" she said no I didn't even know he was leaving I was in the hospital, the judge said do you want him back she said HELL NO! Not after everything he has done to his daughter and myself. So it' has worked out in my favor thank you everyone. Will be along time before I help any family members again.
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You found your father and you want the relationship so bad you will take the abuse? Just like lying isn't illegal, placing him in a Nursing home and loving him at a distance and visiting isn't either. He needs to get into a routine of being cared for, bathing, eating, and meds.,etc. I have a rule in my home, if you don't eat, or take your medicine, I call an ambulance. I am not going to get charged for not feeding an elderly parent, or holding their meds. Lying now, leads to accusations later. COA! Cover your A**!
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I agree with others posted here. You owe this man nothing. He isn't a renter who has renter's rights so you CAN evict him or drive him to a bar and drive away (without telling him what you are doing) or something. He's lived this long on his wits, he can continue. And if don't have the emotional strength to do that, find a counselor who can help you build up that strength.
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My solution which seems not to have posted this morning was to pre pay for a room in a long stay motel then pack up his sorry arseand take him on a long drive (so he can't find his way back and deposit him there and give him $50 to $100 for food. That will give him enough time to pick up another woman in a bar to move in with. You may need help from your sons or brothers and a bottle of whisky but it can be done. have someone change the locks on the doors while you are delivering him to his new home. He will be fine he's lived on his wits for a very long time. Don't give the motel any contact information for you or your family. You can do it you don't owe him anything. tell the help that he moved out and you don't know where he is. You are not responsible for him. hope we will hear you have done it tomorrow.
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Why won't you evict him?
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I wish it was that easy, but no I own my home.
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