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My situation is unlike many of yours, as I am working as a caregiver 35 hours per week, and am not caring for a family member. I am a young guy in my 20s, and sort of stumbled on to this job, which I am working four days a week (Monday-Thursday) while I take classes at night.

I am a caregiver for a woman in her 40s who was paralyzed in a car accident many years ago. Her mind is sharp, but she doesn’t have much physical mobility and is in a wheelchair. My responsibilities including bowel care, showering and dressing duties, transfer to the wheelchair, meals, and general tasks of everyday living. Her husband works during the day, and he is with her in the evenings and at night.

My problem is the micromanagement. While she is a sweet lady, I think she feels like she must be in control every moment. Her husband indicated that this was true, but I didn’t know that it would be at this level. She instructs me in quite a bit of detail, for example, on how to get applesauce out of a jar, how to make a sandwich, etc. There are also cases where, if I have to help her vacuum, she’ll follow me around the room pointing out each little piece of dust to vacuum up.
I’ve been doing this for about a year and a half, and I really need the money for a while longer, but I’m starting to crack a bit. I know it’s not her fault. Is it the nature of the job? Or is it possible she is a bit too overbearing? Thanks for your advice.

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Open communication is always best. Trust me. You are providing a wonderful service to this family. Now you need to tell them what will make it easier to give optimal results as this is your intent.

Caregiving can be really thankless at times... and exhausting. What is required, in part, is to step back and see the bigger picture. This woman can only control life around her, as her body is very limited.
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Thanks for the answer. I almost feel like it's part of the job. Mentally, she is in great shape. She runs the household so, in essence, the caregivers that work for the family are essentially acting as her fingers and toes for the day. So I perform like a million different tasks minute-to-minute, most of them while she is watching me do them. Over time, this adds up, and I'm becoming anxious and depressed. I assume this is how it is for most caregivers, though.
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She is too much. Here is what I recommend - sit down with her and the husband and let them know that you are really thankful for the job but there are a few things that are concerning you. You have nothing to lose.

BTW, what a gem you are to serve this paralyzed woman!!
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