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The support and ideas we get from each other are inspiring. Many of us don't have the energy to do much of anything except exist. Then, I think we can surprise ourselves with fun and cool things we can manage to do.


Since I've been with Mom in her house for eleven months (man, has it been that long!?) I've been wanting to work on my writing. Since being here I bottomed out of energy and couldn't accomplish anything. I brought a draft screenplay. This past weekend Sister 1 took Mom for the weekend and I finally got the "umph" to finish the rewrite. I am so tickled!


What fun, cool, or activity you're proud of yourself for?

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Traveled with DH to Az last week. He was working and I was keeping him company. We flew into Phoenix and went to Prescott, Grand Canyon, Sedona and Jerome. All amazing for me. The weather was great.
For one segment of the trip we stayed at a B&B with a delightful Japanese couple. Discussed elderly at length one night. Seems the elderly in Japan die of cancer and surprisingly of suicide quite often. Long discussion on how the culture of the family is such that elders have large savings and life insurance that goes to their children when they die. So many of the elders are concerned for their families well being due to the poor economy. The insurance pays even though it’s a suicide if the children continue to pay the premiums for like two years after the parents death. Rumors are that the gov is looking to change this law to try to prevent the elderly from committing suicide. According to our host, the wealth of the country is with the individuals and not the country. Healthcare is extremely affordable. Part of their longevity (according to the wife) is due to prolonged life sustained artificially. It’s not a POA choice as to care decisions but the doctors choice. Hospital fees for a three day stay for pneumonia about $30.
Average longevity is in the 80s for both male and female. (Online it says 79 men 86 women).
Eldest son’s wife gets the honors of care taking sons parents.
The husband of this couple was born in Hawaii. His father had a choice to go into the military or Japanese confinement during WW II. He chose the military. He is buried in the National Veterans cemetery in Hawaii.
The wife was born in Japan and her mother is care taking both her parents. Evidently the grandfather has dementia. He had a stroke and is now bed bound. Our hostess said that she felt bad for her grandfather being bed bound but now life was a bit easier for her mom not having to constantly search for the grandfather as he wandered.
The wife was into NASA. We watched the Space Shuttle zoom overhead one night. It circles the earth in 90 minutes. The few minutes we watched it went from Az to Nebraska. There’s an Ap of course. Amazing this world we live in.
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Veronica, how exciting to be closer to family in what sounds like will be a great setup for you!

I am getting ready to build a house. I have looked for a house already built for a year. The prices for already built homes are absurd! But, they are selling because it is impossible to find a half way decent rental here. Can build what I want for less than the same house would be if it were already built. I never would have been able to do this in the area where I cared for mom, the prices are through the roof!
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We take a cruise every year toward the end of winter. It really kicks off the warmer days to come.
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What a great question! I think we tend to get so involved in the drudgery of routine, I.e. is she okay, we forget the spark that makes us ourselves. I bought a new computer, joined a computer club and have no guilt! That, was my "cool thing."☺
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This Sunday, my husband and I will take the kids snow tubing. It's our biggest break in 14 months. And I got a good Groupon deal on snow tubing, too. My little toy poodle will stay with my best friend for the day. We'll leave food out for the cats and chickens. My brother is going to come and stay with our mom all day. He hasn't spent that much time with her before, only 3 or 4 hours a week. I am going to point him to this website to read up so he will learn a bit more about Alz condition. Looking forward to a fun day.
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I'm working on 3rd sequel to novels published on Amazon; going a little slow, but got there twice, not too worried. Even better; we just took the money husband had saved up for our 25th in May and bought a really good new RV to replace our '95. We'll try to use it for a week at anniversary time, for short rec trips this summer, and hope to be living in it by next year, when this house is empty and sold. This winter is/was the last straw! (3' drifts everywhere and I'm not sure I can get out of the drive to go to work Saturday lol).
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Oh Veronica, it sounds perfect! One story is good; small yard, too.... And your daughter near to help? Wow!
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To-days cool thing was agreeing to go and live near eldest daughter. She has found a house that she is prepared to buy and rent to us, housing near her is three times the cost of where we live so could not afford to buy ourselves.
L has found a really nice one story rambler totally redone with a fully finished basement and manageable yard. I fell very blessed in haveing such a caring daughter. It is a little larger than our current house but with a much smaller yard. Plenty of room for DH and I to get away from each other. For the first time in my life I am going to have granite counter tops. Does that mean I will have to cook gourmet meals?
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Wow, I really had to think of something....anything, I've done recently that was out of the caregiving spectrum. (My job is a nurse and I care for my mother in a memory care facility.)

Hubs, the dogs and I went for a hike at El Salto Canyon in Ensenada, Mexico (an hour from Tijuana) a couple of weeks ago.
It started off easy... flat dirt but then got a lot harder, crawling over huge black rocks. The payoff is a deep canyon where some brave souls rappel down the sides. (Not me!) We had made sandwiches and iced tea and had a picnic in the park afterwards.
It was nice being out in nature with the dogs. Kind of clears the cobwebs out of your brain.
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Sunnygirl1: I finished a screenplay set in 1846, a mystery. I've just sent it off to several contests. Plus I've started another screenplay based on another of my books, set in 1930s in Wyoming. If I didn't have something of ME stuck in Mom's house I'd go nuts. Great to read about others' cool things. You all are inspiring.
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I think I have my hands full, but, I'm considering taking a class online for a health unit coordinator certification. Hmmm......not sure. I may be spreading myself too thin. And what do they do anyway?

I just love anything involving music. It just feeds my soul. Concerts are so expensive though. Even small acts are pricey. I paid $138.00 per ticket for Robert Plant, but, do you know what ticket brokers were charging? One fan, who flew in from the West coast just for the show, (she sat behind me on second row) told me that they were going for over $2000.! I guess because it's a short tour and only covered a handful of cities.
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No techie here
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Sunnygirl , congrats on the weight loss. That is inspiring girl.
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Saturday my dear husband had to go into work, sorry babe I have things the guys will need Monday morning, so I said can Sugar, my service dog and I go to just hang out, then take you to lunch, so off we go. Then my husband says why don't you run the tractor, oh yea, give me instructions baby. So I am learning how to operate a tractor with a scoop and a shovel it was the best day I've had for 9 months. Also has put me on a new path of learning hand signals. When I got off after like 3 hours my husband was like wow you did such a great job, it must be such a good win for you with all the crap your dad is pulling, oh man, 3 hours and not one thought about it. Then he took us out for a steak and shrimp lunch. I am so Blessed.
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Sunnygirl Way to go!!!
You ARE getting it done. Congrats. The concert sounds great too.
The last concert I went to see was Jimi Hendricks music about 3 years ago. My ears are still ringing.
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MountainMoose, Congrats on getting yourself motivated and starting. What kind of thing are you going to write about?

I suppose that my latest adventure was last week. I went to see my favorite performer Robert Plant in concert! We were fortunate enough to get FRONT row center tickets, so, it was perfect. It was AWESOME!
And, I met so many nice people at the show! OMG. So much fun! I used to attend concerts all the time, but, stopped when life got so hectic and demanding. I have vowed to go more often now.

And, I've made some more moves on starting a new profession! I don't want to state what, but, I hope it will be amusing and a change of pace. I also hope it will enable me to retire comfortably. lol

AND, I'm now down by 50 pounds! Slow and steady is my motto, so, physically, I feel so much more better. Still some to go though.
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Glad to hear you are feeling better HolidayEnd!

Hard to believe half of February is over. I tried a new Texas BBQ restaurant and the food was so good.
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HolidayEnd
I bet you ARE thankful!!
Two bouts of flu is really rough.
Glad you are on the mend.
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I’m coming out of one, if not the, most severe bouts of the influenza of 2018. This was part two, I had pneumonia from the influenza in 2017, back in November.

I AM THANKFUL!
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cdenreader and 97yroldmom: Well, great for you two! Dreaming in a new furniture store, and painting and cooking classes, that sounds wonderful!
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Dear MountainMoose,

This is lovely reminder for all caregivers to focus on self care once in awhile.

Last year I was a bit better about going to paint nights and trying cooking classes. This year I haven't tried anything new yet. You've inspired me to think about this some more and I hope to write back with something soon.
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I bet that was a good time 97. I guess I was wrong, you got to do something cool.
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I went to Furniture Market in Los Vegas a few weeks ago. I went with a designer friend. We walked over 10,000 steps each day. Heard great speakers. Heard live music and had good food. I looked for dining chairs for seniors (without much success).
It was a great break.
Thanks for asking MM.
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I guess no one gets to do too many cool things???????


May God bless.
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PS Mountain I also am very tickled for you.
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Mountain I too am a writer and have been trying to finish a book I began before becoming a caregiver, now I cant find the time, but one day.....
The only cool thing I have done was gave some homeless people food today.
Not too often get to do cool and fun things. Hopefully as you have done I will be able to finish my writing soon.
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I'm dragging my husband on a cruise. His mother is in rehab after a stay in the regular hospital, less than 2 months after a stay in a psychiatric hospital, and she can't call us because we'll be in another country. Our kids will be here and have a # to call if they need us but they'd better not need us!
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