How do I get over the guilt?

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I'm caregiver for my husband but I work full-time. He has 4 grown children. I have a part-time sitter. He and I both have been very sick with upper respiratory. I need to go to a seminar for a week in Florida. I took him to the doctor Tuesday morning when doctor's office opened - gave him a shot, more meds, breathing treatments. He's getting better, I think. His daughter will come and stay with him at night and work with the sitter during the day. Now he's giving me the silent treatment. Why should I feel guilty? I go to work and come home. PERIOD. I don't have any life outside of work and home. Not even taking time to exercise. If he makes it next month ... he'll be 92...I'm on 60. I've taken care of him for 24 years. I'm not going to go to the beach, but going to a seminar for my job. Why does he put me on a guilt trip? Is he scared? I'm concerned, but I can't be here all the time. Even if I am and it's his time, it won't matter. How do I get over the guilt?

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Look upon the silent treatment as a blessing. Others say that silence is acquiescence (means he agrees). Some people just cannot be generous and say goodbye, see you when you get back.
SO, GOODBYE, HAVE A NICE TIME!
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Sounds like his mind may have digressed enough with his Alzheimer's that he's seeing you more like a little girl that a parent needs a tight reign on. I don't understand what the dynamic is or what level his Alzheimer's is, but it may have a role in all of this.
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Guilt goes with caregiving. We feel guilty because we want to and can continue our own lives. We have to be able to do that. Your working outside the home and caring for your husband at night, I know, have been a big help to him. You do have to keep going.

One of my favorite sayings has always been "Feel the fear and do it anyway." We can change it for caregivers and say "Feel the guilt and do it anyway." Maybe you can remind your husband that he was once 60, too, and had things he had to do. You'll be home as soon as you're finished and will bring him back something nice. That will give him something to look forward to.
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