Vacant feeling. Please share some revolutionary tips.

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Been to the downs of caregiving which is called "vacant"? empty, drained out. Pls share some revolutionary tips. Only for sole caregivers who don't get help from anyone.

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I am amazed everytime I read these and hear the stories as they are so close to mine!
I need to pull out my beads now n then and make something sparkly! I can get lost in them for hours never a care!
But somehow caregiving has stolen the simple outlets as well,
My poor lil Jack Russell Terrier (I mention his breed because they need the excersize) is a saint, he has learned to sleep most of the day but he also can just look at me with those eyes saying come on, lets go, And I just wanna cry I tell em im sorry lil boy, I can't! when I can and should just snap a leash on and get out for a few....he and I would both be the better for it!
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Keep it real. Strengthen your mind and body. Read, yoga, nutrition, laugh, be honest, cry, talk, write. Pray, or meditate. This will fill the vacancy, which I don't think is really vacancy, but a form of isolation boredom. You need to interact in real life, even if with birds and animals. It will bring you a connection to the divine.
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Vicodin works wonders. Maybe not the best advice, but it's been working for me lately.
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Oh captain, your mom.
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@ jeanne,
" madness " lol
beeeb-abeeeb-abeeb-abeeeb, etc. mom has been standing in the driveway this am hurling my sockets and wrenches as far as she can throw em. cool, this is better than warner bros cartoons.
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Bookluvr, my condolence, hugs & love to you across the planet :-(

Hope with all the support from us here at this website, you'll gain some strength during this difficult moment for yourself & your dad. My prayers to you. GOD bless. Hugs. Love.
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Kamil, sorry that your country has not progressed enough when it comes to elderly care. I believe having an organization or a caregiving group starts from someone on the ground, called grass roots. It will have to take a lot of normal people (small people, poor people, middle class people, etc) to get together and decide to do something. They hold meetings, go to businesses for sponsorship, etc... In the US or Canada, etc..it did not just happen suddenly. It starts from the bottom and works up to rich and powerful. And it takes YEARS to reach where the US and Canada are. The same applies for any organizations. It starts small and spreads among the people and then goes up to rich/powerful for sponsorship.

By the way, I sometimes type here and mention mom in the present tense. Mom has passed away just in March. So, I'm now caregiving for bedridden father who at the moment wants to die, in severe lower back pain and refuses medical help. I've been doing some running around the past 3 days. I am now down to my last card and will just have to give up.
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Dear bookluvr. Im sorry that you suddenly feel tired. I know that taking care of 2 bedridden parents is so overwhelming.
Ok, back to above, YES, i did Google & everything else. Short story, maybe the society/population here is not ready/enough quota for the government/NGO to elevate this matter to its proper/relevant place. We dont have the Medicaid thing. We do have Welfare Dept but mainly only for really poor people. Elderly care is rare in the list. Just basic welfare issues. In a way, I think USA residents should be very grateful enough to have all the resources they could get accordingly to the disease/care. I guess thats why the "vacant" feel follows me everywhere. And also related to my other question about sharing photos/videos; is all about creating awareness. That this is real. We cant be alone. We need to be heard. We have to care for ourselves too. It could happen to anyone/family/generations to come as the worlds elder population is increasing. Not forgetting all the complicated diseases that "suddenly exist" nowadays.
So when there's no awareness, the taboo/stigma thing affected the families, friends, workplace, society, religious parties, etc & the nation as a whole.
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Kamil, have you tried Googling for a caregiving support group in your area? In our island, our support group started out from the University program. They wanted to do a study of the increase of dementia on island. Father found this program from calling around. The program would provide a limited time service of their caregiver to come once a week and limited supplies for mom. In exchange, they would do home visits,test mom and document the changes that occurred as the years go by. That program then became independent from the university. But, this program also included monthly caregiver's support.

What I'm trying to say is first call around the government offices for any recommendation of programs that you are not aware of. If that doesn't work, then call the nearest university if they have a program for elderlies. If that doesn't work, then find a Christian religion and ask if they provide services.

My siblings finally took 23 years later to start helping us. In all those years, I updated them by slow mail (post office), email, and then texting. They don't care to help until they are good and ready to help. The more you make them feel guilty, the angrier they get. And they won't help...I just suddenly got sooo tired. I will close for now.
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Owhh another thing is VENT out. From my personal experience, to find a really genuine listener is hard. Most dont understand what we been through or just dont want to understand? I dunno. Not sure if they scared or just don't know how to react. The word caregiver itself is like alien or UFO which u need to explain with science! Even if I show pictures/videos(only to closest ones) the reaction is so passive that I feel like to slap their face (my siblings). Need them to do groceries, dad's facial grooming, cutting nails, watever. All the life's basic. If they cant stand the poops & bathing its ok, that might be my specialty. Which i think is not. Someone just has to do it. The rest of family/fiends will just owhh...ahhh...I see. So how do we ask for help when all we get is passive response?
Venting out online is fine with me. Its just not the same like venting it live, in person, in reality.
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