As the year is about to end, and a new one coming, I thought once again of one of my many resolutions. What are yours?

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i.e. never to talk about caregiving Does anyone feel this way? What I mean is my mom is actually very much alive. But I've had this resolution since many years ago that I always break anyway. I thought that if I go out, meet friends, talk to them on the phone, or do job search, I want to consciously omit this part of my life and not to talk about my ongoing caregiving duties as I feel that this is one reason why I seem out of place in our society and that all the people who knows me avoid me because once I open my mouth, it's all about my caregiving duties & my mom's very long survival of Alzheimer's that's the topic of my talk. Does anyone share my thoughts of deliberately not talking about what we do as caregivers to our parents. In so doing, we hope to re-connect with the world who is oblivious to the world of caregiving and re-connect with the younger crowd, the crowd who earns more money & spends more time on social functions rather than stay at home tackling diaper & medicine issues or unceasing incontinence, sundowning, mood swings, etc. I thought that if I do ignore the presence of my elderly mom, even though I would still do my duties to her, but make it appear that to everyone that I have social life once again, then perhaps my "social life" and my being cheerful, bubbly, young, energetic self will re-surface again and that I get back little by little to the modern world. Please share your views.

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I have to loose weight in belly area to possibly keep from a nasty surgery for Gerd called a Nissan Fundulipication, cure is worse than symptoms. Have to change my diet completely :( Need to purge closets, house it getting pretty full. And need to find a active hobby. And be more positive. Hugs to you all.
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In Jan 2011 I was taking care of both of my parents: mom 89 and dad 91. My new years resolution for 2011 was GET HELP. I hired a private paid aide to come in two hours in AM to help get my parents up, bathed and fed, and then one hour at night to feed and get ready for bed. IT SAVED MY LIFE! Three hours a day helped me sooo much. My mother did pass away in June at the age of 89 however, my dad is now 92 and I still have the aide coming in to help. He loves her as much as I do and she has made my life easier. Even if you can only afford an aide a couple hours a week it is well worth it. New years resolution for 2012: start taking care of myself.
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I make the same resolution every day! It lasts about 5 minutes or until anyone stops long enough for me to say hello, then I just seem to launch into the whole thing. After 3 years of helping my mom with Parkinson disease and dementia, the nightmare not only of care, but her bills, taxes, cost of meds, doctors that never answer your calls, reactions to meds... It is so overwhelming, and my mom is in an assisted living "memory care" facility. I have found that the only people I can communicate with anymore are other people who have had or are going through a similar experience. Then it turns into a pity party. Outsiders just don't understand what we go through and with other caregivers it turns into just a depressing situation. I try every day to see how long I can make it before the conversation segways into "caregiving." I guess just keep trying not to lose yourself and hold onto a few things that you enjoy to help you still be yourself.
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Maybe it's like when you go on a first date. Big mistake telling the person your whole life story right up front and scaring them off. You need to ease people into this thing that you do day after day. In your case, you need to make friends or reconnect with friends first. When you find someone that you have a connection with, THEN you can start peeling the onion back so to speak when you think they can handle it. Right? Good luck getting your life back (kinda). ha
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