You have to take care of yourself and you NEED to keep yourself safe. If it is no longer safe for you or others to care for him then there is no option but to place him in Memory Care. Medication can help with anger, anxiety, frustration so talk to his doctor about what is happening and start medications that may help. It may not help right away. As with a lot of medication the correct dose and the correct medication has to be found. YOU have to take care of YOURSELF.
In an earlier post you said your grandfather didn't like you. As Maya Angelou says when someone shows you who they are believe them. Don't give him the time of day or the opportunity to hit you again. You can't expect him to pretend he likes you. That's not how dementia works.
I have a hard time understanding some of your posts. Also a reply you made to someone elses post.
I don't think you understand how Dementia works. I think your expecting more than what your Dad now can give. The first thing people with Dementia lose is their short-term memory meaning what you tell Dad one day he will not remember the next day, sometimes in the next minute. They lose their filter and their empathy. They can no longer process what is being said to them. You want him to pretend he likes seeing you? You are expecting too much from someone whose brain is broken and dying.
He hit you. That is not good. If it happens again you HAVE to report it. He needs to be medicated. He needs to be in a care facility.
From other posts you've written, the doctor has diagnosed your father with dementia which you believe is not dementia but a personality disorder.
You and your siblings have decided to visit him daily at his home bc he refuses to be placed in long term care.
Is this accurate?
You've been getting advice telling you that you cannot use reason or logic with an elder suffering with dementia, yet you told him yesterday to "pretend to be happy to see you" and were waiting to see if he remembered to pretend today. He didn't and you were forewarned that's the nature of the beast with dementia.
My advice is let his doctor know his behavior has advanced to physical hitting. Then stop visiting him. You may have to wait for a crisis to occur whereby the hospital refuses to release him to move back home to live alone. That's when he moves into Skilled Nursing even if he doesn't want to.
In the meanwhile, read up on dementia so you know what to expect from dad as it progresses. I'd believe the medical diagnosis if I were you. I'd also avoid visits where he can hurt you again, and trying to reason with him, bc it's not possible.
If there's a next time call 911 right away and they will take him to the ER for evaluation. Don't go pick him up when they discharge him. Tell him he's an "unsafe discharge" and then ask to talk to the hospital social worker to see if he can go directly into a facility where he will receive the protection and medical care he needs and you can have your life back.
If it is no longer safe for you or others to care for him then there is no option but to place him in Memory Care.
Medication can help with anger, anxiety, frustration so talk to his doctor about what is happening and start medications that may help. It may not help right away. As with a lot of medication the correct dose and the correct medication has to be found.
YOU have to take care of YOURSELF.
I don't think you understand how Dementia works. I think your expecting more than what your Dad now can give. The first thing people with Dementia lose is their short-term memory meaning what you tell Dad one day he will not remember the next day, sometimes in the next minute. They lose their filter and their empathy. They can no longer process what is being said to them. You want him to pretend he likes seeing you? You are expecting too much from someone whose brain is broken and dying.
He hit you. That is not good. If it happens again you HAVE to report it. He needs to be medicated. He needs to be in a care facility.
You and your siblings have decided to visit him daily at his home bc he refuses to be placed in long term care.
Is this accurate?
You've been getting advice telling you that you cannot use reason or logic with an elder suffering with dementia, yet you told him yesterday to "pretend to be happy to see you" and were waiting to see if he remembered to pretend today. He didn't and you were forewarned that's the nature of the beast with dementia.
My advice is let his doctor know his behavior has advanced to physical hitting. Then stop visiting him. You may have to wait for a crisis to occur whereby the hospital refuses to release him to move back home to live alone. That's when he moves into Skilled Nursing even if he doesn't want to.
In the meanwhile, read up on dementia so you know what to expect from dad as it progresses. I'd believe the medical diagnosis if I were you. I'd also avoid visits where he can hurt you again, and trying to reason with him, bc it's not possible.
Good luck to you
I literally thought this was written in Cyrillic on the first read.
A change in mental status (hitting, agitation, new delusions) can signal a medical event like a stroke or UTI.
Calling 911 would not be an over-reaction. Get him to the hospital and get him evaluated.
AND talk to the social workers about the fact that he lives alone and needs to be in long term care.