Mom was on floor while I was changing a huge mess in pants. I went to get a bowl of soap and water to clean her and slipped falling. I tried to miss her when I fell but I wasn't totally sucessful. My feet went out from under me and the bowl filled with water and myself both went flying. The water dumped on top of her and I grazed her side on the way down. She having dementia, didn't understand and started to become angry and not cooperative any more at all. At first she didn't seem hurt other than her pride, not to mention I didn't feel so great either. The next day when she had to cough, she held her side as though her ribs were injured. The same night I needed to put up the side rails on her bed so she couldn't fall out when sleeping. Well she somehow got arround or over the rails into the living room. She may have been injured climbing out of the bed for all I know.

She at this time had visiting nurses coming in to tend to a wound on her foot and I had them check her ribs. All seemed well. I still feel very guilty about possibly hurting her. I too have a disability and my leg wasn't as steady as I thought when I fell. Again another few days later, she is in the hospital with a UTI. I'm hoping when she is xrayed there isn't any damage to her. Help me forgive myself as I am having a hard time. I second guess the way I handled her care and I know I shouldn't as I was the only one here to help her and what I was doing was a necessity.

I'm lost in guilt!!

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gladstone, you know, I wouldn't be afraid to tell the doctor or whoever is examining her that you slipped and fell and part of you hit your mother. Stuff happens. You're doing the best you can with the circumstances you've been put in, so cut yourself some slack. If in the future you need more sturdy legs to help you do the things you physically can't, then maybe by a doctor knowing what happened to you this time, will circumvent getting you the help you need next time. Forget it, you didn't kill her for heaven's sake. ♥
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Accidents happen, especially under the stress of caregiving. I once accidently put ear wax removal drops instead of eye drops. I called paramedics who came, flushed the eye and confirmed with poison center that no permanent damage would result. I also was on the phone crying to the opthomologist who also tried to calm my fears. Despite this, I still feel terrible about it to this day. CAUTION: KEEP EAR DROPS IN A SEPARATE LOCATION FROM EYE DROPS since bottles are the same shape. This apparently is a common mistake.

I now double check everything I do and try to remain calm and take my time. If the mess is already there, then taking a few minutes to work slowly will not hurt. Make sure you have sturdy non slip shoes.

If you think your mother was injured either during your fall or geting out of bed and they have not done the necessary exams to find any such injury, you might want to tell them about the two accidents.Also, you could be injured also. In the future, don't be afraid to report any accidents that might need to be checked out. Can you get any help with hands on care from any programs in your state? Do you and/or your mother have an emergency alert necklace to call for help if you fall and can't reach a phone?

Best wishes to you and your mother.
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