How do I get over the grief of watching my mom die while taking care of her?

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You just did, by venting it. You should call her doctor or your hospital and ask if they have support groups for you to attend. Sometimes support groups help. Your mother is very lucky to have someone like you to take care of her. I take care of my mother and she has dementia. I have people come in and stay with mom while my sister and me get out of the house twice a week, it's not easy to watch your love one change or think it would happen to her. But somehow we all get thru it and go on. Your not alone in this, we all are here because we have someone who have medical problems and we need to support each other to get thru our own problems.
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My heart goes out to you. No doubt this is the hardest thing you have ever done. In the natural course of things children outlive their parents, so most people experience the death of one or both parents. That it is universal does not make it less painful. And watching the progression of a debilitating disease at the end is especially painful. Take advantage of the experienced hospice staff. They have helped people through this many times, and have a sense of what you are going through.

You have had your mother in your life for many years, and that is a blessing. Hard as it is on you, it is also a blessing to be able to be there for her in this last part of her life's journey.

Hang in there. You will get past this. You need time to heal.
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