We can't get out of my mother-in law's sight who's lived with us for 4 years...feeling smothered and big burnout!!! Any suggestions?

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my mother-in-law has always been there for me,since my parents died when I was in my 20's/ she has never ever interfered in our marriage ,,,when her husband died she started depending on us and 4 years ago came to live with us because of her health.
It seems like in the past few months we just butt heads, i feel like I am getting smothered not being able to freely leave the house with out having to explain and feeling guilty i am beginning to resent her and Hate my feelings. My husband always puts me first and he helps me on weekend taking the pressure off of me so I can get out some but I love for us to be alone too. am I being selfish wanting to do a few fun things alone with my

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You are not being selfish. It's only normal to want some alone time for yourself and also alone time as a couple. Have you considered adult day care? The socialization of ADC can really help as then she'd have had a social outlet and may be physically tired, as well.

You are fortunate (as you know) that your husband stands up for you. Discuss these options with him and see what he thinks. Others on the forum will likely add their own ideas so please keep checking back.
Carol
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I think your feelings are perfectly natural. You would probably feel the same way about an ordinary houseguest if they stayed long enough. If it helps any, I can feel like my soul has been sucked out of me after just a *weekend* with my grandmother, who has dementia.
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You are not being selfish in the least. Anyone would feel the same way if we had someone shadowing us everywhere we went in our house. Is there anything your MIL enjoys doing? Something you can plop her down in front of that would capture her interest for a little bit?

I'm glad to hear that your husband pitches in on the weekends. It's his mom after all.

I imagine that I would feel resentment as well. We all need space at times and being deprived of that would make most people feel resentful. The suggestion of an adult daycare is a good one, definitely something to look into.
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