My loved one, 64, has Parkinson's disease, dementia, hallucinations and paranoia (a side effect of her medicines) and is sometimes ambulatory. I'm almost certain she has undiagnosed REM sleep disorder. Her behavior triggers are fairly predictable- for instance when she is woken up from a deep sleep or when she is hallucinating something scary and her reality is denied. She has kicked people in the ankle and hit people. It is not particularly frequent. More frequently she swears at people and yells, but not every day. She has done a little exit seeking. She does not usually remember her behavior the next day and is often delightful and grateful and loving in the morning. Afternoons vary, but she is usually not poorly behaved. She gets bad almost at night. She is on tons of medicines including Seroquel and just restarted Nuplazid. I'm hoping it will help (it helped before) and that she can be weaned off the Seroquel which has kept taken the edge off and kept her out of the hospital but is not very effective. She is given Ativan in a topical gel once or twice a week. None of it makes her sleepy- she sleeps 2-4 hours a night. I want to find a nursing home in Eastern Massachusetts or Southern New Hampshire. I would consider the Greater Austin and Dallas areas as well, and even moving to somewhere else entirely. I am desperate. It has to be a place that takes medicaid. I don't even know what state to apply for medicaid in, as I have yet to have a nursing home agree to take her. The nursing homes I have applied to on her behalf have turned her down. She has also been turned down by two acute rehabs with Parkinson's programs. I am starting to look in to free standing hospice centers. It is all alarming and I am very discouraged. From what I am reading psychiatric units generally don't take people as medically fragile as her (she has been on hospice since September and weighs 90 pounds) and nursing homes don't want behavior that crosses a line. There are very few places that do both and the two I know of in Massachusetts are one that is average and in the West of the state and one that is not nice at all.

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My husband is on Nuplazid and it’s a miracle drug that works for hallucinations. When he started lashing out at people suddenly, I had him checked for a UTI and sure enough, he had one. He was living in a memory care facility and he was seriously dehydrated. I had to change facilities over that. The new one isn’t pushing liquids either. I see what goes on during meals. The glass is put down in front of them and taken off the table with maybe a sip taken. No one noticing or caring to notice.

It seems so unreal that a nursing home would turn down your Mom’s admittance. That’s what they are there for.

Try Texas, since your willing to move. If her hallucinations are nasty, mean people coming to visit her, it’s one of the signs of Lewy Body Dementia. Something else to think about that we don’t need.
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Reply to Rosemary44

Have you tried calling an agency like A Place For Mom? You can also visit the website of the National Institue of Mental Health, and ask for help. Call your local area Agency on Aging. The behaviors you say your mom is exhibiting don’t sound much worse than what my mom did and they accepted her in a Memory Care unit with no issues. I don’t understand why your mom would be denied admittance unless it’s because of her physical health, but the units are attended by at least one nurse.
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Reply to Ahmijoy