My grandmother and I didn’t get to know each other when I was younger. My dad was more of a hermit and I didn’t get to know any of that side of the family. My dad passed away 14 yrs ago and he was my grams beneficiary so when he passed it got put into my step-mother's name. I believe had she known my brother and I this would not have been the case. My SM lives on the other side of the country and two years ago she told me Grammy was living in despair and not taking very good care of herself so I went to check on her. From that day forward I’ve been taking care of all of her needs and living 45 mins away this was no easy task. Very stubborn woman and I had to fight her on everything just to get her meals on wheels and a visiting nurse. You wouldn't believe the struggles. So when she had a fall and went to the hospital, went to rehab I took the opportunity to keep her in the nursing home which is absolutely what she needed. I had to clean out her apt alone and make all decisions on her behalf. I became her legal guardian and was her HCP. I visit her as often as I can and am consistently making sure she is taken care of. I’ve had many meetings about what I feel needed to be improved. So my point. Step mother has not seen her in two years and before that was 5 yrs. Like I said my dad didn’t see her often so I can count on one hand the times they (my dad and SM) saw her. I’ve gotten to know her asked as many questions as I can think of to learn about her and my family I missed out on. I love her more than I thought possible. She’s like one of my kids I’d do anything for. My SM has since remarried, and is still the beneficiary and nothing can be changed at this point bc gram has been deemed incompetent. When I asked SM how the moneys would be split up she got defensive. I feel like I’m giving her the opportunity to be fair but if she’s not (which history indicates, when my dad passed he had no will and she didn’t give my brother and I anything) I plan to do something about it. But WHAT CAN I DO? Sorry for the very long explanation!!!!! Thanks for any input!