My wife has significant financial resources while I am on fixed income and struggling to pay bills. I have asked her BIL who holds her POA to reimburse me for half of utility bills, mortgage payments (joint deed with survivorship), medical insurance, etc. So far no response - any ideas on what to do next?
You ask us if it is fair for her to pay bills for the house while she herself is in care? Well, perhaps, but she can also demand that YOUR MARITAL ASSETS go to pay for her care, rather than just hers.
Clear this all up with the attorney. You may need a separation and along with that a division of finances. Because it seems your name was not even on any of her accounts! (????). Because if it is then those accounts can be tapped for her care as well as any separate accounts she has in her own name.
You badly need an attorney and his/her advice and options, because what is FAIR has ZERO to do with what the law is. Fairness doesn't matter under the law. Only how things are written, contracted, deeded and etc.
As her husband POA brother of hers can still cause you a whole lot of woe by demanding you CONTINUE TO PAY as you always did. So take care and get an attorney.
Hope you update us after seeing an attorney.
If wife is living in the same house, then I would say yes, she needs to contribute. But if she is living somewhere else, then her earnings go to her care. Money before the marriage is hers. Inheritances are hers. I suggest you consult with a lawyer.
your wife has a brother . Her brother is her Power Of Attorney. POA.
The missing information is perhaps, and we do not know Your Wife or your whole story.
Perhaps, you met wife
and prior to your courting her and marrying her, she set her brother up as her POA. Perhaps she had physical health issues prior to meeting you, and the closest person before you, was her brother. So, therefore she made him POA..
since we do not know the whole story, we can only imagine and create our own backstory to your question. Hence, Alvadear stated you need to seek professional advice….
take Alvadear’s advice and honestly consider what she noted.
Because ordinarily it would be YOU as POA for wife, not her brother.
If your wife is currently LIVING with you in the FAMILY HOME owned by you both, and living with you as HUSBAND AND WIFE, your assets would be shared by you as well your bills.
So I am saying here that there's something missing in this story, and the circumstances here are unusual.
Your wife's brother, as her POA is responsible, of course, for paying her bills for her. As a wife living with her husband in the family home, she would have expenses. But as a separated wife, living on her own in say MC or ALF, the case may be otherwise.
Now, if your wife is no longer living with you, and is in care, your BIL would be paying her living expense to the care facility.
If this is a joint deed, you can likely force a sale through the courts, but if your wife is mentally incompetent to the extent BIL is caring for her as POA this would likely be a long and expensive court battle.
If you have a mortgage payment which is coming due AND your wife is in care and needing her assets to pay for her care, this is EXCEPTIONALLY complicated, and you need the advice of an attorney ASAP. Don't count on a Forum, just a bunch of folks with no legal expertise and without all the facts in your own particular extremely complicated case.
Good luck to you.