The above is a link to a great article to help you spot the 25 signs of a passive/aggressive covert narcissist. Of course, if your father also suffers from dementia, that can make for an even worse situation! Once a narcissistic type person develops dementia, ugh, things get even WORSE than ever before b/c they lose the little filter they once had! My mother fit into this category, and I dealt with her antics for over a decade, so yeah, it's not easy, I know.
Here's a link to an article discussing the Gray Rock Method to use with a narcissistic personality type:
Of course, you'll have to adjust things to take dementia into consideration, and that your father lives in your home (I read some of your other posts/comments), knowing that you can't just leave the situation entirely, since dad LIVES with you.
Do use google or your favorite other search engine and simply type in the words "going grey rock". Will give you excellent explanation. Basically think of a grey rock. If you rant at it, accuse it, make demands of it, it is basically going to sit there and not say a word to you. Often when people are narcissistic or manipulative or furious out of all control, the best thing is to not respond at all. This would assume you have tried the nice responses of saying "I hear what you are saying; I will think about that", or "I am so sorry you feel that way" over some time. Have fun exploring this fascinating idea. It kind of plays off of "it takes two to fight."
Basically you set you boundaries of what and how much you are willing to do and when they are ranting and/or being unreasonable you pretend you are a "grey rock" and don't rise to the bait, you just let it wash over you. This usually goes hand in hand with limiting contact as much as possible.
The above is a link to a great article to help you spot the 25 signs of a passive/aggressive covert narcissist. Of course, if your father also suffers from dementia, that can make for an even worse situation! Once a narcissistic type person develops dementia, ugh, things get even WORSE than ever before b/c they lose the little filter they once had! My mother fit into this category, and I dealt with her antics for over a decade, so yeah, it's not easy, I know.
Here's a link to an article discussing the Gray Rock Method to use with a narcissistic personality type:
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/grey-rock#definition
And another showing 5 simple techniques to use:
https://www.blunt-therapy.com/how-to-gray-rock-method-a-narcissist/
Of course, you'll have to adjust things to take dementia into consideration, and that your father lives in your home (I read some of your other posts/comments), knowing that you can't just leave the situation entirely, since dad LIVES with you.
Best of luck!
Basically think of a grey rock. If you rant at it, accuse it, make demands of it, it is basically going to sit there and not say a word to you.
Often when people are narcissistic or manipulative or furious out of all control, the best thing is to not respond at all. This would assume you have tried the nice responses of saying "I hear what you are saying; I will think about that", or "I am so sorry you feel that way" over some time.
Have fun exploring this fascinating idea. It kind of plays off of "it takes two to fight."