Follow
Share

I have 2 siblings whom are appointed 1st and 2nd POAs by my parent. Arguments have developed between them... the primary POA is the parent's "favorite", and has always been spoiled by them. The medical POA lived near the parents, and helped them since age 18 or 20 (now age 68); never asking for anything in return. One parent died about 35 years ago.
Both POAs lived near and remained in constant contact with the surviving parent, but the primary POA remained dependent upon the surviving parent, "taking from"... The medical POA always "gave to" the surviving parent in the form of heavy work in maintaining and improving house, shopping, maintaining bank accounts, paying bills, appointments, pet-care, errands. Never receiving payment, nor expecting any payment. There are 6 siblings.
We took care of the parent together for about 2 years... the "primary POA" enforced demands and criticism until 2 siblings bailed out; then 2 years after they left, the Primary POA began harassing and demanding until, one-by-one, the other 3 departed because they couldn't stand the stresses anymore. The parent always took his side, so nothing could be negotiated. About 7 months ago, this Primary POA began to single-handedly care for the parent alone, moving in with the parent. The POA does not inform any siblings of the parent's condition, nor situation; the house has become dirty; the parent receives 1 bath per week and often has feces and urine on the backside, the blinds and curtains are always pulled and the entire question of being welcome depends upon the whim of the primary POA... who manifests signs of paranoia, extreme secrecy and sociopathic behavior. POA has recently taken control of money, bank accounts, acquired a new van etc. Calls to "Adult Services" are now ignored because an agent visited many times before (3-4 years ago) when first 2 siblings complained and 4 were taking care of the parent; yet the situation has deteriorated since POA chased everyone away 7 months ago. POA has refused to allow the Medical POA visiting- rights; and does not notify Med POA when parent is hospitalized. Is this legal? Any advise would be helpful.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
This is yet another reason the split/shared POA arrangements never work out the way they are intended to work. No, the primary POA cannot refuse visitation by the medical POA. Call the police and they will allow you in. Bring your POA paperwork with you. Pam's suggestion about filing for guardianship is a good one, but you will need to be prepared to offer real proof of neglect or abuse, or your petition will be dismissed. Get photos of the dirty house, feces, urine stained bedclothes or linens, etc. If bro has the problems you've mentioned, no judge would allow him to continue in his role, but the judge could also deem you unfit and appoint someone you don't even know. Keep in mind that both POA's have no obligation to share information with the other siblings, and can actually be held accountable for improperly releasing confidential information. But they are obligated to share info with each other, as it is essential to the role both POA's are performing. Medical information is always to be safeguarded and kept confidential and shared with family members ONLY if the person represented wanted that done and expressed that wish while he or she could, either by leaving written instructions regarding this, or by notifying the medical providers of the names of people that are permitted access to that information.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I think you all should go to court for a Guardianship hearing and let a Judge sort it out. The only person who can appoint or fire a POA is the patient themselves, but they must be competent to do so. You need a Judge.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.