sandraann Asked June 2011
Can power of attorney be changed if the parent and the legal guardian do not get along anymore because of the sickness?
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i have been taking care of my Mom for seven years now both my Father and brother are passed i also am power of attorney and now things are really getting to where i cannot handle situtation anymore im not experienced for this part of moms sickness and i try to explain things to her so we could come up with better plan but just leads to fighting arguing no good she gets very upset with me so if she is not 100percent together due to ilness could she change power of attorny even if i felt wasnt in her best interest someone plz ned advice thank you
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Which brings up the question of her mental state. Does she have cognitive impairment? Dementia? Do you think she is still capable of making decisions?
Who would she have for POA if she revokes it from you?
You could keep the POA to help out with financial and extreme medical decsions. However, your Mom needs another placement and you need your sanity back. Caring for your parent does not mean that it has to be in such close proximity. On your own, start collecting information about ALFs and NHs and visit them. Get recommendations from doctors, friends, and others who have parents in these facilities. Then you are armed with some concrete ideas and plans.
Everyone wants to stay in their home until the end...not a realistic result for most people. Once you find a good fit for her, start the ball rolling, make a timeline, and keep reinforcing to your Mom what a good idea it is. Once she sees that you are not backing down, hopefully she will focus on her new life. And you can go back to being the caring daughter.
Even in the best circumstances, I think that it is very hard to combine two households; whether that be having a parent or adult children (and their children) move into your home.
I don't think you are trying to escape the requirements of having the POA, but the day-to-day care of a seriously ill parent who needs more medical and physical care than you can provide.
Good luck...let us know that you made one small change toward your goals.