Can I receive an income from the state or get help for taking care of them as a caregiver since they cant do this without me?

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My mother smoked and drank for 60 years. She has COPD and is an alcoholic. She has cataracts, bad circulation in her legs, she's 75. My Stepfather is 82. He just had Cancer surgery, and has the worst case of Dementia, on top of it all. They can't live without supervision and care, and can't look after themselves, so I moved them in to take care of them. Since they need me, can I receive an income from the state or get help for taking care of them as a caregiver since they cant do this without me and both are under Doctors care and have no one to Drive them either?

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I "almost" took in an elderly aunt (for a couple of weeks) after she suffered a fall and back injury. I was considering it due to her not wanting to pay for a sitter. My father (her brother) and her other sisters all told me "NO! DO NOT DO IT! It will never end!" After reading stories here, I'm thankful I listened. She is now in ALF and doing well.
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Reply to XenaJada
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Your profile says you have your father living with you. Do you now have THREE elders living with you?

Now you're beginning to learn the dirty little (actually BIG) secret of elder caregiving in the U.S. No one wants to deal with it, and it's often dumped on one (often unsuspecting) person. And the most frequent question on this site is whether someone can get paid for doing elder caregiving.

Are there other siblings? Half- or step-siblings?

Maybe your mother and stepfather need to be in a skilled nursing facility if they can't take care of themselves.

Do they have any funds? If so, then THEY can and should pay you. Make sure it's a legal caregiving contract.
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Reply to CTTN55
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So you moved them in to take care of them. OMG!! Can I borrow your SuperCarer cape?


Are you the only person who supervises them? Are they getting some in-home help now, besides you? What do you have set up for breaks for you? How long ago did they move in? How is it working out?


But as to whether you can get paid-- They can pay you from their SS checks, pension, selling assets, etc. You should have a written agreement about this. For example, my mother paid my sister the same amount for rent that she had been paying for her subsidized apartment. My mother was on Medicaid and my sister had the choice of being paid by the state for caregiving, or having help come in. I think the pay was about minimum wage and it was for a limited number of hours each week. Sis said the pay helped her feel good about doing legitimate work, but it certainly wouldn't have supported her. The state provided a house cleaner once a week, to do the part of the home Mom occupied.


I think, though, that your cape may start wearing out, and you may not be able to continue to care for them in your home. When my sister could no longer care for our mom, Medicaid covered her nursing home costs. So if your parents qualify I'd say apply sooner rather than later. They can get some help at home now, and full help in a care center if/when that becomes necessary.


Start by getting a needs assessment done. You could talk to the hospital social worker where stepdad had surgery. You can call your county's Human Services Department and ask for an in-home assessment appointment. Or you can call your Area Agency for Aging.


After you have a needs assessment for each parent, I suggest you call Area Agency for Aging and ask for advice about low-cost legal consultation, to be sure you have all the documents you need to properly care for them in place.


Just curious ... if your mom drank since she was 15, was your childhood home somewhat dysfunctional? How have the two of your gotten along as adults? Did she marry your stepfather recently, or is that a long-term relationship? Did he help raise you? (None of this has to do with getting paid, so ignore it if you don't want to get into that kind of discussion.)
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Reply to jeannegibbs
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97yroldmom has good advice. But what you’ll get, maybe, is home health care a few times a week. They won’t offer you 24/7 care or anything like that. You won’t get paid enough to live on and there’s no health coverage or other benefits. Plus, you’d have to draw up an agreement with them that they’d pay you out of their own resources. Are they on Medicaid? Are you responsible for their finances—do you have POA?

When you call your ,local area Agency on Aging, ask to have them evaluated. They may have other suggestions for their care.
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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Call your local Area Agency on Aging and ask them to come do an evaluation of any services available for you or your parents.
Normally the answer is no. But depending on your area and your state you might find some assistance.
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