I have my 84 year old grandmother's financial and medical POA. She has dementia and also has a drinking problem. My aunt is her youngest child and is a horrible person, she is a sociopath in my opinion. She takes my Granny to the bank everyday to get money and encourages her to drink and smoke by taking her to buy beer and cigerettes, my Granny does not drive. My aunt's incentive for taking her to the bank is gas money. I had the bank put a $50 daily withdrawal limit on the account. Granny recently burned her legs on space heaters because she fell asleep sitting in front of them, probably after drinking. I have contacted APS before about checks that Granny was writing to family members as loans but they never paid the money back and was told that if Granny signed the checks, there was nothing they could do. What can I do about the sociopath aunt? She knows that Granny has dementia and was told by Dr.s to stop drinking and smoking because of high blood pressure.
You have a problem. Actually you've got several; but the main one, the one that is the key to everything else, is the question of your grandmother's mental capacity. You need to get it established whether she is or is not capable of making decisions in her own best interests; and it's while she's in rehab that you've got the opportunity to get that assessment *done*. When was she diagnosed with dementia? - and what has been the follow-up on that?
Have you considered stepping back, letting the state step in, so your job can be " loving granddaughter"?
I have set her up with appointments with the neuroligist and psychologist while she is at the rehab facility but from what Im being told she has to be declared incompetent to be forced out of her home, unless young children are involved.
My aunt has made this even more difficult because prior to her going to rehab, she would take my Granny to the bank everyday to get money for beer and cigs. Why would you encourage someone with dementia to drink?
I sometimes feel like just giving up and letting my mom and aunt figure this out but my Granny nevered trusted that her children would do the right thing, which is why I have been on all her accounts since I was in high school....I am now 44.
I have lost so much sleep over this.
Make sure she has a neurological assessment BEFORE she leaves the rehab.
What is your mothers role in her care?