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My dad has been living with me (daughter) since the end of Aug 2021 due to having moderate stage Alzheimer's and his wife not being able to take care of him. I have Durable POA since Sept 15 or 16. I have been trying to get the information needed to switch everything to my care but have not been able to get his bank info that his SS money goes to. I was told by his wife, my step mom, yesterday that she will mail me his cards, foodstamp and bank, in the mail and he will have money on them next month. I asked her what about Sept and Oct payments that were deposited but not given to him. She said that my dad told her she can use that money to buy her a car! She can't even drive!!!! I told her NO but she said it was already done! That is not right! How can I get his money back for him???

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Just a thought, foodstamps? How does he receive his own card when they were married? And now that he is living with you, that may all change. When my nephew was living with my Mom, he was not entitled to food stamps because my Mom was not on them.

Is this real is correct about the SS. This is October and any check received this month is September. That would be the one ur entitled to. Your stepmom can write you a check for that.
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Isthisrealyreal Oct 2021
JoAnn, my dads exthang got food stamps for herself, while she was married to my dad. Actually she had all kinds of government assistance. I don't know how she did it, I was to angry to ask. I figure if you need horses and 8 dogs my tax dollars shouldn't be feeding you, a lifestyle change is in order.

Some people are professional SCAMMERS for government assistance. NOT SAYING THIS ABOUT THE OP, NOT EVEN IMPLIED.

Sorry for the rant, just saying it is possible for 1 spouse to get assistance and not the other and in their name only.
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As has been said you need to become representative payee. According the info on the SSA site:
"Contact the Social Security office nearest you to apply to be a payee. You must complete form SSA-11 (Request to be selected as payee) and show us documents to prove your identity. You will need to provide your social security number, or if you represent an organization, the organization's employer identification number. Usually, you must complete the payee application with us face-to-face."
You can call or go online to see what their face to face procedures are currently but they will guide you through the process and explain when Dad gets his ss checks.
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You need to become representative payee for your dad, that is how you will be able to take control of his SS.

Odds of recouping any money at this point are pretty slim, because dementia is involved she can get away with "He said..." especially since they are married and his mailing address hasn't been changed.

It is also entirely possible that there has only been one check. It is paid in the arrears, so September payment is for August, October payment for September and depending on when he gets paid he may not have received September yet and she is entitled to August to pay their bills.

Best of luck.
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If she has already spent it, I don't see how you can get it back, especially if your dad told her to use it and he hasn't been declared incompetent.
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