I encountered the same problem with my cousin. She had appointed me Durable POA and Healthcare POA, years earlier, but she was not open to moving into AL. I got her to the doctor and the doctor did exam and explained that she could not live alone and that she needed AL. She also had diabetes and hypertension. Both needed daily meds and she was not able to do it. Plus, she had multiple falls and fractures. The doctor completed a state form that she needed AL. My cousin was not on board at first, but, the doctor and I strongly encouraged and gently pushed. It took a few days.
I explained that the AL would provide her with temporary physical therapy, nutritious meals, medication, therapy to help her memory, etc. She eventually agreed to go for awhile. Of course, after a while she forgot that she had a home elsewhere.
If you can just get her there for a little while, she may learn to like it there. I think that sometimes they get scared being at home alone. They don't know what is happening and it scares them. That's one reason they keep calling people and wanting them to come over.
I would discuss it with her doctor. My cousin's doctor told us both that she would not let it go. To me, that meant that if she didn't got to AL, she would bring in adult protective services to intervene. They don't like to get the county involved, if there is a family member with DPOA and HCPOA, but they will if the risks are too great and the dementia patient's situation is too serious.
So much depends on your aunt's level of competence. Many people with dementia are able to stay at home for a while if certain precautions are taken and there is help that comes in. Often older people with dementia are afraid of leaving their homes. Their homes are familiar to them. Perhaps it would be good to locate a facility and arrange for you and her to have lunch there a time or two. Facilities often offer this service. She may find that she likes it.
If her dementia is serious, her medical team may need to get involved to steer her toward what she needs to do. Are you both her financial and medical POA?
It's tough to get an elder who has dementia to move out of their own home, whether one has a POA or not. Elders want to live there forever. Would your Aunt accept around the clock caregivers? You could start there.
I had POA for my parents, and it was my Mom who refused to move out. Thus, sometimes we need to wait until there is a major medical emergency where the person is taken to the ER, stays in the hospital 3 days, goes into Rehab, then easily transferred to Assisted Living or long term care. A serious fall at home pretty much forced my Mom into long term care.
Another thing, depending on your Aunt's age, most in their 80's and 90's remember nursing homes were asylums for the elders who were "senile" and the places weren't very nice. So if anyone mentions a nursing home, that elder would dig in their heels, and even refuse to preview the modern up-to-date friendly facilities.
No. POA gives you the ability to do the things that the grantor needs done, e.g. pay the bills. It doesn't give you any power over the grantor. If the doctors decide that your mother is not competent and can no longer live alone, it does give you the ability to locate a place and arrange for her to move in. Believe me -- it is never easy when the person in question is opposed to the plan.
I explained that the AL would provide her with temporary physical therapy, nutritious meals, medication, therapy to help her memory, etc. She eventually agreed to go for awhile. Of course, after a while she forgot that she had a home elsewhere.
If you can just get her there for a little while, she may learn to like it there. I think that sometimes they get scared being at home alone. They don't know what is happening and it scares them. That's one reason they keep calling people and wanting them to come over.
I would discuss it with her doctor. My cousin's doctor told us both that she would not let it go. To me, that meant that if she didn't got to AL, she would bring in adult protective services to intervene. They don't like to get the county involved, if there is a family member with DPOA and HCPOA, but they will if the risks are too great and the dementia patient's situation is too serious.
If her dementia is serious, her medical team may need to get involved to steer her toward what she needs to do. Are you both her financial and medical POA?
I had POA for my parents, and it was my Mom who refused to move out. Thus, sometimes we need to wait until there is a major medical emergency where the person is taken to the ER, stays in the hospital 3 days, goes into Rehab, then easily transferred to Assisted Living or long term care. A serious fall at home pretty much forced my Mom into long term care.
Another thing, depending on your Aunt's age, most in their 80's and 90's remember nursing homes were asylums for the elders who were "senile" and the places weren't very nice. So if anyone mentions a nursing home, that elder would dig in their heels, and even refuse to preview the modern up-to-date friendly facilities.