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This is like an ongoing saga...so after the dirty coffee table incident and after my mother remained shut up in her room for 4 days - like a thief in the night, she left in the middle of the day while we were at work. Without a car and no friends - I can only suppose the woman called a taxi and got carted around the city. She managed to close her bank accounts and get an airplane ticket and get to the airport. Someone picked her up when she arrived back in Iowa.


She left behind ugly letters to me and my husband. She wanted to tell me not to come when she died because she doesn't want me there. Her niece that she relies on let me know that she was retrieving her from another niece's house and bringing her home because she was in "bad shape". My eye!


It's been a month now. I refuse to talk to her and had my cell number changed 2 days after she left. If I hadn't, she would have made my life unbearable with calls and texts. The same old story - "do you love me? do you want me to come back? tell me you love me. are you going to be my daughter?" My husband is happier and is not such an angry bird. My son, and daughter in law will now visit us.


It's probably good that she is gone. I think my MS has made me less emotionally stable...I can't handle this kind of ordeal so well any more. My guts and gizzards are all ascrewed. Guilt rides on my shoulders 24/7.


My poor husband gets the texts - today was "I'm broke. You probably don't consider me family anymore, but can you send me money?" OMG!!!!! I am totally going to have a breakdown and die before I see my 65th birthday in 3 weeks.


Why can't I get away from the controlling claws of my mother and move on!!!

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Well you changed your number, now it is time for your hubs to change his. Your nieces can email you.. Good luck!
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Let the niece call help for her if she needs it. It sounds like it's best to let her be elsewhere. Saving my sanity makes me feel good and without any guilt.

Does she suffer from cognition problems? If so, you might report it so professionals can investigate. I've known seniors who are agitated, bombastic and impossible to deal with, and it turns out they have some mental issue. I'd consider that with her, but, allow others to deal with it. If you are certain that she is of sound mind, you can have an attorney send her a Cease and Desist letter.
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Tell husband to block her. On my phone, if the person is not in my contacts, the phone doesn't ring just goes to VM. He can delete it there. Just don't listen to the message.

My cousin had MS. She could not tolerate stress at all. It put her in the hospital at times. Yes, it does make you emotional. You need to stop feeling guilty. There is nothing you can do for this woman. She is playing you. Please, do not take her back. You should be taking care of yourself. She chose to leave. She has to find her own place. When cousin calls tell her with MS you cannot take care of Mom that she makes more work for you and you can just about dealing with your own house. That the stress she causes makes the MS worse. Maybe your husband should talk to cousin. Sometimes the info coming from a spouse is more believable.
Maybe talking to a therapist may help you. Some insurances will pay.
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