Can I be charged with neglect, even what my Mother tells people is not true?

I too have seen that older folks complain of treatment, just to get sympathy. What's equally problematic is their complaints to others when something does happen but failing to tell their primary caregiver.

Your mom might have some level of cognitive decline, and if so, so she's beyond being able to watch what she says. My mom will sometimes say slightly inappropriate things just to be making conversation and I cringe inside. But I know she doesn't have the ability to filter what she says.

I will on occasion remind her right before we go somewhere (like the bank) not to say this or that. She can remember it in the moment...but only if I tell her right before we are there.

If your mom looks well cared for, is clean and not losing weight, I doubt others will put too much stock into what she's saying about her care. If you're with her, you can just "Oh mom, you're exaggerating" or whatever is closer to the truth. Good luck - it's hard to take care of these seniors and maintain our sanity sometimes!

If someone were to report her allegations to Adult Protective Services, I think they'd certainly make a visit to her home. Yours wouldn't be their first rodeo, though, and your story is far from unique.

It must be said, though, that they certainly COULD deem her unfit to live alone. That, after all, is part of what they do -- safeguard people like your mom.

I would make sure the house was getting regularly cleaned by you or others...that there was always fresh food in the fridge...and that obvious fall hazards were addressed to the best of your ability.

Just.in.case.

Sure do wish we could edit our own posts on here. I hope you all can read through the misplaced language in my post above.

I don't know, but my guess is that the legal authorities are too busy to run around investigating complaints where no actual harm to the elder has not been abandoned and no actual harm has been shown. That said, it must be really aggravating to be putting out so much effort to take care of someone and have them bad-mouthing you or even trivializing your efforts. I would be very upset, but I wouldn't worry about legal action. My mother is somewhat of a drama queen and I could see her exaggeration minor issues to get attention or sympathy. If your mother has dementia, maybe she's lost the ability to distinguish between fact and fantasy. I'm sure people can tell that she's being well taken care of, regardless of what she says, so I wouldn't worry too much about their reactions or possible legal action.