Parent has been diagnosed with dementia. My older sister is staying in my mothers home because she cannot go to a home because of financial reasons. Sister is driving car every place including back to her home which is 45 minutes away, once in a while. She has sold things. Can she refuse the rest of us things we want in the home when mother passes away?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Janet, I noticed on your message board your wrote "what can happen when a sibling finds the will and reads it before parent passes away?" Just curious, what is your concern?

As Power of Attorney and being the Executor of my parents Will, I was able to read their Wills before they passed. Glad I did, it would have been a nightmare the way it was written, it was so out-of-date. I was able to get my parents in to see an Elder Law Attorney to create updated Wills to reflect current State laws. Plus put together new Power of Attorney, and create other legal documents my parents never had that were needed.
Helpful Answer (1)

Janet, when you think about it, with your sister being in your Mom's house to help her, she is keeping Mom from going into a nursing home with Medicaid paying the bill. With Medicaid [which is different from Medicare] the group can place a lien on Mom's house so that Medicaid can be reimbursed for Mom's care. Then no one gets to share the house once Mom passes.

As for selling things, do you think sister is doing that to help pay for household expenses? Becoming older can be costly. And if Mom still has some clear thinking, she can ask your sister to sell whatever Mom wants to bring more money into the house.

As for sister driving car every place including back to her home, allow your sister to have some freedom as long as Mom can still be by herself for a couple of hours. There will come a time in the future where your sister will be caring for your Mom 168 hours per week, thus will have to bring in someone to sit with Mom while she goes grocery shopping or to her own doctor appointments or out buying things that your Mom wants. She will rarely get a chance to drive back to her own home.

If there are things in the house that you want, ask Mom if you can have those items now. And if you can, please help your sister take care of your Mom, otherwise your sister will burn out quickly, then what?
Helpful Answer (0)

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter