I'm sure this has been asked/answered here, but I was focused on other things. My mom is burning through her savings with 24/7 home care since my dad died last September. (She had a stroke 10 years ago and is in a wheelchair, declining mentally. She's 85). At this rate, we estimate she has a year of savings left. What should my next steps be? I have POA, she owns her own home. The attorney we've been working with (theirs; had to use her to fight for access to my dad's safety deposit box) is about worthless. We're in a very rural area with no elder care attorneys. Do I need one? I'm doing this from 3 hours away. I work 6/7 days a week and travel to my mom's most Sundays. I need to be as efficient with my time as possible. I'm already at the end of my mental rope fighting to gain her access to her investments.
If Mom has about 1 year of resources left you want to get a facility lined up for her that will accept Medicaid when she runs out of private funds (most AL's in NJ have very limited Medicaid beds). You will have a pick selection if she can go into one while she is a private pay. Try to get her on a list for facilities that have AL MC and LTC on the same campus to ease the strain of moving if her needs should become greater in the future.
Medicaid is administered slightly differently in each state but most will take a 5 yr look over the shoulder to make sure funds have not been "gifted" in order to qualify for Medicaid. Gather as much of the paperwork they will require before hand. This will generally include birth, marriage, death certificates, divorce decrees, title/ deed to the house, titles or bill of sale of any cars she has owned in the past five years, minimum of 3 years (5 is better) real estate tax bills, bank statements, utility bills .... you get the idea.
Sounds like she may need more care than can be provided at home but if you are hoping for home care again the eldercare attorney can tell you the resources that may be available in your area. You can also contact your state Office on Aging for resources.
Wishing you good luck on your journey. Please keep us updated.
one week later that my Dad who was at home at 97 being cared for by my brother who passed at 69 yrs old,...got sick ,meaning he had to admitted due to wandering and falling in the house with some pneumonia, a UTI who knows but went to rehab to a NH during which time i decided that I could not take care of him..so after the 60 days for medicare or whatever it was as I did not expect any of this...I had already gotten Dad Aid and Attendance which paid 900 dollars to his 800 social..for the past three years but he qualified five years earlier and we just did what any good kids do was keep him home...so when he went in to the NH he stayed after I filed the Medicaid papers..........Now we never had gone to an elder attorney...never planned..we did not have any money in the bank other than his funeral expenses, 10,000...this I believe is what most people who are working class would have....im just giving you a picture of most peoples situation..Dad did have a will and my brother and I owned the house....by the way my brothers Funeral was 17,000 dollars...this for a wake,excellent Funeral home,plot and burial...................I fortunatly had money for this as well as his IRA where I borrowed thirty thousand to cover...as well as any bill for Dad at his nursing home which sent me a 3500 bill out of nowhere,including the hospital for brothers brain operation where I paid the 4500 by the way i did this and did not have to pay the hospital at all for my brothers bill...so you just dont know how this will play out....looks like the inclination of working class people is to avoid lawyers here you really did not know when the fallout would come but it did and I was in charge..had my Dad lived, he died four mos later...I think i would have brought him home..and had hospice here...but you just dont know certain things and the death of my brother had me in a griefstate..i suspect my Dad also but he had some dementia...thks to my brother who took very consientous care..perhaps to the detriment of his life...Dad did occasionally ask for his son I simply chose to fib and say he was on a vacation to Italy...he accepted this in his semi conscious state I believe I made a conscious decision to simply not upset the limited understanding that my Dad had.
Make multiple copies of the POA to provide when required. Some financial institutions may required written, verbal, or in person consent from the account holder before that will allow access.
How long has your mom lived in her AL? While ALs are not required to accept Medicaid, in Ohio most will accept a Medicaid Waiver if the person has been a resident for at least 2 years. Talk to the director of her facility, they have lots of experience in this. To to their advantage to keep her as a client.
Get an appointment with a Medicaid case worker NOW to find out what information is needed. It’s better to have too much info then submit the paperwork and find out you missed something. You will probably need to sell the house, why should Medicaid pay fees when your Mom owns a valuable property? It can take weeks, if not months, to get approved.
Was your Mom or Dad in the military in a time of war? Check into Aid and Attendance VA benefits. We found out that Mom was eligible for $1200 a month due to dad's service in WWII. Korea and Viet Nam count too. They require stacks of confusing documentation but was worth it.
Have you considered a reverse mortgage on the property? It might be easier to just sell the house. If you expect to need Medicaid then don’t try to preserve the house for an inheritance.
If you don’t want to sell then you are going to need work with a lawyer to figure out how to transfer or sell the property to the heir(s). Then you will have to figure out how to cover her costs for the 5 year look back period before she qualifies for Medicaid.
I am going through it with my mom now. I had the experience of my cousins and brother-in-law to help me. I was 4 hours away and if a different state and going there every other weekend. Mom was living alone. She went into hospital and then into rehab. I found a place 20 minutes from my house AL,MC and NH all in one. That way as she needed more help it was all there. The was a huge stress relief. It was recommendation from a lawyer and help of my cousin. I tried the care advisor but they did not give me names near me that fulfilled the requirements. They do not represent all places I found out. This place would take Medicaid when she needed. We are in private pay now in AL/MC. Sold house which will give her another 2 years of care in MC. Get the list of items needed for Medicaid and start gathering them. Also I'm consolidating accounts. Keep good records. If dad was a veteran there may be some benefits. Wish you luck.
What is the care arrangement in her home? Does she have one caregiver who lives with her and takes care of her, or is there several? If she's paying hourly for round-the-clock caregivers that's a fortune. A live-in or two (they split the week) would be the way to go in her case.
What's going to happen is her money and assets are going to be depleted paying for her care one way or the other. Either it will be paying for aide care to keep her home, or it will be to a care facility. So if she's happy being in her own home with her aides, why not just let that continue until she's out of money?
When that happens she will have to go to a care facility and they will do her Medicaid application. Her house or houses (if there's more than one) will have to be listed for sale. Her investments will have to be cashed out and liquidated. All this you will be able to do with POA.
If you can't find an attorney to help or can't afford one, check with your state government Agency on Aging. All states have one. They often have staff people who can help with Medicaid applications or long term care planning for free. This is not an overnight process, so starting sooner rather than later will help provide the time you need to sort everything out. Praying for you because I'm going through the same thing. Try to set aside some time to focus on getting your questions answered from the state Agency on Aging. Don't try to do this alone. I learned quickly that help is needed with this process.
Assisted livings are limited in the kind of care they can give. They are not skilled nursing. It maybe cheaper, though to place Mom in one. If her care is too much for an AL, then you may need to place her in a nice Skilled Nursing facility. Then you do what I did, pay privately. This will get you placement faster. When the money starts to run out, then u apply for Medicaid. Make sure the facility you choose excepts it.
Medicaid does have a program where aides are supplied but its rarely 24/7 care. It can be only 4 hrs a day.
You really need to talk to an Elder lawyer well versed in Medicaid.
It sounds like she would benefit from a facility. Her needs would be met and she could have some socialization.
It is better to place her while she is still some what cognizant, it makes a difference in how someone adjusts to their new home.
I would also try to locate her closer to you. It will make your advocacy so much easier.
Igloo wasn’t being sarcastic. If you read her posts, she has much wisdom in financial/legal matters.
She is asking for specific answers, in order to give you informed replies.
Come back, and give us another try.
This was a mistake.
the POA, has it ever presented a problem for you to use?
When dad died, were all financials that were in his name or his SS# was attached to, changed so that all currently are in moms name if she was set to inherit or be beneficiary of OR did dad have pour over will so a Trust established? Or is the distribution of assets per dads will still not finished up in probate? or has dealing w probate not been done?
You mention the old atty seems useless…… useless in what way? Disinterested? or they do nothing probate related in their practice?
She likely has a checking & a savings account, right?
How many banks? Do you personally bank at any of these?
Her income (like SS) is all being direct deposited, right?
Are you a signatory at each bank on all her accounts?
& r all POD (pay on death) to you?
All this about figuring out how best to consolidate stuff.
You mention investments, what type?? if stocks, have you ever spoken with her broker? If it’s property (house, land), do you have the original paperwork on initial purchase, Warranty Deed, and Release of Deed and what is the market like to be able to sell a house or land?
if it’s CDs or T bills, when is the next expiration date?
24/7 is likely costing way more than a NH would cost. Her moving into a NH soon & putting house on market before winter sets in makes sense to do. Just what has kept this from happening now that it’s a year since your Dad died?