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Mom (85) with memory loss. She is safe in senior living where they do the cooking, cleaning etc. She no longer drives. Things seem good where she is and she loves it there. Only the one brother takes all her social security checks from her checking and now is talking her into only 25 thousand from her investments. I have tried to talk to the bank since I am the POA and also listed as her agent on the acct. No luck! They say she is the client and it's her money to give as she wants. She lives in CA and I live in HI. All the other siblings have moved from CA too. Only the one who lives there in town takes her directly to the bank and gets withdrawals. She can't even remember doing it. Frustrating!

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As POA I would get on a plane ,go to the bank, close out that acct, set up a trust acct., set up an account for her SS that you have access to and leave the dead beat bro with no way to continue ripping off your Mom. Just say'in.
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It may require a trip to California. When is the last time you were there? And I would not tell anybody you are going. Visit all of Mom's financial institutions armed with the POA. If it is a springing POA make sure you have taken Mom to the doctor first. Spring POA's require that there be incapacity before the documemt goes into effect.

Once you have the letters if the POA is spring you can visit the financial instututions and close the old accounts and open new ones that your brother does not have access to.
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Sounds like a set up for disaster if your mother ever needs to apply for medicaid because of people taking out her money which will look to medicaid like gifts. Also, it is not legal for that one brother who is taking all of her social security checks money out of the bank. I don't think contacting APS for your mother dose not have the mind to realize what is going on or that she should be pressing charges. The only thing I can think of is guardianship, but she must have two doctors who evaluate her and say that she is not competent who will testify in court and the whole things costs $5,000. Maybe some others have better ideas. I'm sorry that you two live so far apart!
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oh I could write volumes on what I experienced as a caregiver.One family sat in the room waiting for their mother to die,wiping out her accounts, ordering out for food,and asking when she was going to die exactly because they had plans..playing cards, ...pretty selfish and disrespectful...may require a trip and an elder lawyer...first talk to your brother,explain the consequences and then act....as for the lady that was dying..she managed to survive a month thus requiring her family yo put all the money back into her accounts and canceling their plans...I could go on and an but you get the drift..you may have to take legal action..good luck and God bless...don't worry "what goes around comes around"..that family had to face the consequences...legally..
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I would talk with your brother and rationally explain the consequences to him. Explain that what he is doing is considered undue influence and could have long term consequences making your mother ineligible for medicad. If that does not work have a talk with your siblings and have each of them talk with him stating if it does not end you will call APS and then it will be in the hands of the law. Being a POA from a distance is hard. As POA I think you should be able to exercise for influence over the bank is the documents are written correctly. You say that your brother is taking far more than the $5000 that it will cost to protect your mom. As POA you are required to legally protect your mom. If you are POA and this is happening under your watch you are legally responsible in most states to take action. It is a personal conflict to call the authorities on your brother but it is a legal situation for you if you allow this to continue. If you can't stop the situation with your rights as POA you need to pursue guardianship.
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When I was going through the same situation, my lawyer told me that with a POA I have the power to stop a family member from bullying my mother into giving him money. I would definitely check with an attorney on what type of POA you have and what does that mean in CA. If you can legally, I would definitely close the account and set up a new one for SS that you control, perhaps sending her an allowance and paying the facility. Guardianship is tricky, as I tried to go through the process myself. If your brother contests, it may get really expensive and end up nowhere.
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Pita2u, check to see if there is a Legal Aid office in your area, said group is available for those who cannot afford an attorney.
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I always find it comical when people suggest to talk with someone who is immoral & rationally explain the consequences. Don't waste your time trying to talk rationally to your brother. This would be like explaining logic to a loony. If he thought there would be consequences then he'd stop.
I would suggest looking into the banks actions. They will understand logic. Ask for a copy of every document regarding your moms account you are able to see & make sure they are following the law at the federal & state level. Be sure to ask a manager for these things not some who-ever you get on the phone. Tell them you are going to file a complaint with the the FTC & any other government financial & banking oversight organizations you can find online. That should turn the tide.
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GladImHere and Panapal point out that you have the means to take care of the finances from where you are. You can set up a new bank account and have the current bank close the account and wire the proceeds to the new bank. I would suggest a bank that has a branch that you can access so you can visit in person and speak to a manager if you need anything in the future. You should go to your local social security office with the power of attorney and any documentation you have about her account and arrange for her SS payment to go to the new account.
Of course, if you do that, you must also take responsibility for getting her bills paid, etc. You will need to pay the senior living establishment and any other creditors from the new account. Arrange to have all bills sent to you, and if she gets mail, have a forwarding order put in to make sure you get everything. You need to make sure nothing is sent to her where the brother can get a hold of account numbers, etc.
Another step you can take is put a "fraud alert" on any open accounts, including at the bank and at Social Security. Tell them another family member may try to access the funds - and to demand PoA before talking to them.
Does mom still like to write her own checks or use credit cards? If so, you may need to leave some money in the current account, but move the rest and the future payments.
If Mom is happy with your brother, it could be that she wants him to have the money. If you change the SS checks, he can get it changed back if he gets on the phone with her and Social Security. The only way to prevent that is to have her declared incompetent so only you with the PoA can make transactions. If that happens, you must have a back up or you will leave Mom with nothing. You should find a trusted elder care attorney who can advise you on how these things can be done, AND make sure Mom is protected if something happens to you.

I am living a similar situation - except I am right here with Dad and Bro. Dad wants to give Brother his money. Dad figures he won't live forever and he can help his youngest son. Brother is simply a spendthrift and has always needed financial help. My mother was able to keep Dad's generosity in check, but with Mom gone, Brother is his new best friend (even when I spent 5 years living with Dad to care for him, and paid everything out of my own money). I was able to put a stop to the pilfering. I don't like the situation, but I have no right to complain when Dad gives his money away.
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One thing I have noticed is some of the older generation tend to give a son, who can't even balance his own checkbook, total control over the parent(s) finances.... even though there is a grown daughter who has her degree in accounting and is a CPA. Such old fashion thinking.
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