I am 28 and my brother is 23. We both live with my mom, who is 57 and has stage 4 breast cancer. She is doing relatively well for right now, still works and drives. I plan on leaving next year to live with my boyfriend.
My mother favors my brother and we get along well when he's not home. When he is home, she is abusive towards me emotionally and calls me names. My brother has never helped in my mothers care. She almost died in the ICU twice and he was not there. She had emergency surgery and he left to go to Detroit-my boyfriend had to go sit in the hospital until I was able to leave work to be there. I go to her often 7 hour appointments. His girlfriend calls my mother the c... With cancer and calls me "fat Voldemort". He has a supplemental teaching position (gets paid a small amount of money at the end of the contract) but otherwise does not pay his own bills. My mom pays for his cellphone and car insurance and clothes/living expenses.
When I was working in a bank, I saw that my moms account (at the time my brother and I were on it) was having funds taken out by my brother that my mom didn't know about or authorize. She took his name off and left mine on but always threatens to remove it because "I hate my brother so much". Last week, I caught my brother trying to take money out of her purse when she was asleep twice. I took her purse and locked it in my room. When my mom found out she accused ME of stealing and said brother could never do that, even though I have proven he has before. I don't need to steal-I'm a teacher and my boyfriend has a phD.
Can someone please tell me what to do. My mothers health will decline and I know my brother will continue to take from her purse and maybe do worse. My uncle is my moms POA and I am her health POA and on her bank account. I know some may say not to leave but I will lose my sanity if I don't.