My father is coming in and out of dementia; he knows my name, but sometimes that's all. he stares out the window or at a spot on the wall. He cant hear; cant walk, Sometimes he gets better and at least we talk a little, not really about anything cause its like he denies death. but I got a call yesterday from my younger brother in Ohio (we are in Florida) saying that my older brother (who I haven't seen in maybe 20 years) is in the hospital again, this time in a coma. My older brother was always "the hero"; the king for the day, then drank himself further and further into trouble. He lies as easily as telling the truth and he hasn't called in years. I am struggling as to whether to even tell dad. I don't know if he'd want to get on a plane and go see him (I cant take that time now, and I am quite detached from my brother once I saw he would never decide to stand in his truth). Advice?