BIL stole Mom's disabled parking placard. Sis has POA and won't do anything to get it back from husband. Any advice?

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They won't cooperate. Do we report this to the DMV (we're in California) or call the cops? Mom is being held prisoner in her own home. We got the disabled placard so we could take her to her appointments, shopping, etc, and have always kept it in her home in a place where anyone that was driving mom could find it. BIL says it's his now because he started taking mom to appointments a few months ago. The jerk deserves more than just a fine and mom wants to get out of the house. When 2 of us are with mom, it's not a problem - one person gets out with her and waits while the other parks and catches up. No big deal. But it's rare mom has 2 people visiting at the same time. If we had POA, we'd just cancel it and get another.

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What great advice from everyone. I had one for my mom, and since she could no longer drive, I kept in my car because I was the only one who took her anywhere. When she wasn't with me, I put it in the glove compartment. I was glad to have it when it was NECESSARY, so that we could park where it was good for her. I can't imagine anyone using it if they didn't need it. That's taking up space for someone who was legitimately in need. By reporting this, hopefully it will cure BIL of doing it again! Maybe he'll think twice - if he gets a clue! Maybe he just doesn't care. Good luck with this.
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You can help mom apply for a replacement placard. If he uses it without mom & he is caught using it, he will receive a fine. It should be with mom so anyone taking her out will have access to it. What does mom think about the BIL taking her placard? Is she happy with her POA? The placards make it easier for the disabled to enjoy community events, including shopping. Maybe you can schedule a family meeting and let him know you find it difficult taking mom out without the placard. Good luck
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Note that we did have to give Karma a wee bit of a nudge...
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See there is karma
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I love it!
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Justice! :)
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Tee hee! Chuckle chuckle. I have to laugh. Reported mom's placard stolen last week. I asked a friend that works near BIL to keep an eye out to see if he's using the placard. Just got the phone call I waiting for: Yup, he used it and didn't have mom with him and had no idea about needing the additional paper document that must be carried in the vehicle. Friend called parking enforcement and had his $50k+ Mercedes towed away a few minutes ago. Not just the $700 ticket. He has to pay impound fees, too, and they didn't use a flatbed tow. BIL came out screaming and yelling at the parking officer. They're still out there right now, probably trying to decide if he should be arrested for having the stolen property. What an idiot! So that part of this has been taken care of. Now we just need to make sure he doesn't get his hands on the replacement.
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I would report this in person to the DMV. This is really wrong. When I got my placard for myself, they told me that it is common for these to be stolen and to safeguard mine, which I do.
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No, I live part time with mom, have been trying to get sister to provide care for over a year. Now I'm no longer in a position to continue watching out for mom. Lost my sister a very long, long time ago, so fear of losing her again by taking legal action isn't an issue for me. Don't have the resources to do that myself and I'm finding that APS, the police, etc, don't have the resources to even check it out, which is why they recommended taking mom to an ER, asking for protective custody, and forcing a judge to get involved, which everyone tells me wouldn't be good, either.
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I'm so sorry to hear that. If you are able to do without both sister and brother in laws help, and if you can get evidence that she had dementia when the POA was changed, you can bring them up on charges. You'd be surprised. My mom's oncologist noted her increasing forgetfulness in her medical records. If there's anything like that, you nay be able to use it. Talk to a lawyer. I'm not too familiar, but I believe that exerting that kind of influence over a person with dementia is illegal. You can challenge the POA but you would have to be ready to lose your sister. This is hard, and sad. Does your mom live alone?
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