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My 93 year old MIL (who has dementia and cancer) is progressively getting worse (wondering our home in the middle of the night, confused about day and night, needing help getting dressed, etc.) Since I work full time and need my sleep, I have talked to my MIL's day caregiver about her moving in. She has agreed but I don't know how much to pay her, what possible problems that might arise, and what to expect. Any insights would be greatly appreciated.

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You should check with your state's Department of Labor to see what you legally need to do if you hire an independent caregiver. If you go to www.irs.gov, you can pull up Publication 926, Household Employer’s Tax Guide. That, too, will help you with the business side of the arrangement. I also agree that an attorney should draw up an agreement for both of you to sign. Even if you know the person well, this is a business arrangement, so protect yourself legally.

This arrangement can work very well when you find the right person. It's just wise to know all of the ins and outs so that you aren't faced with any nasty surprises.
Take care and good luck with this,
Carol
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I have not contemplated a permanent live-in care giver for my 87 year old mother who has dementia, is immobile and generally can't be left alone, but I have had a 24/7 live-in care-giver on several occasions when I have got to the point that I needed a holiday. The interesting thing about this arrangement is that the agency I used did a full assessment of my mother's care needs as you would imagine, and then stipulated the number of hours which their care-giver would need to have off each day (as her own personal time). This was a phenomenal amount of time and in order to make it work I had to retain the services of the other carers who come in three times a day for personal care and toileting. So, it is extremely expensive. It also made me realise just how little I am valued as the amount of personal time required by the live-in carer was far in excess of what I as a daughter manage to get for myself.
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I agree with pstegman that consulting a lawyer and getting a contract is the best way to go. Also, you will need to build in personal time for the live-in which will probably mean hiring others to cover that time. Even if your live-in is willing to work without a sensible amount of time off (in exchange for a larger salary) it is not a good idea. You will end up with a burnt out caregiver who cannot do a good job.
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Don't do it unless you talk to a lawyer and draw up a contract. So many here have had problems with eviction when it does not work out. You would have to give her room & board plus pay and time off for her own needs.
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These agencies are obviously in business to make money. Often times nurses have knowledge of caregivers who are independent who don't have agencies fees, policies and regs designed to attract employees. Asking a working nurse will be safer than advertising, we almost frequently have a network of caregivers who may know an available dependable caregiver. There also maybe caregivers listed through 8888485724 of this site that could be more reasonable. But you won't know until look around, and keep asking the questiuons that suit you.
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Exactly! having someone work for you is totally different than living with them. Sometimes the best of friends make the worst of roommates.
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Thank you for the advice!
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FYI, There are agencies out their that have Live-in's as part of there program. Check your local area for help with the aging.
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Thank you. I just wonder what types of problems that may arise. I have a wonderful girl who will move in but I just don't know what to expect.
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