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My mother (88 with mild dementia) has been having loose stools of late. Not taking stool softener (I put them away) and up until today making it to bathroom on time. Sometimes messy, but nothing I can't handle. Today she didn't feel.the urge and messed her nigh

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Can you encourage her to wear an adult disposable? Bowel incontinence seldom goes away once it takes over.
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pamstegma, fortunately she wears one for night and had not changed yet to get dressed when this happened today. She wears bladder control pads during the day, but this is a new, and I hope, rare occurence. It took an illness to get her into the Depends at night - up til then it was a struggle, so not looking forward to having to extend them into day. But we will see how it goes. Thanks for the suggestion.
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For us it was sporadic. The geriatrician suggested taking a couple of anti-diarrhea pills before going out. For example, when he golfed with a league for persons with handicaps, bathrooms were not easy to get to on short notice. He took the pills and wore disposable undies. Because he wanted to remain as active as he could, he cooperated with these measures.

You'll know soon enough how constant this problem will be. I hope that for your mother it is once-in-a-while, like it was for my husband.
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jeannegibbs, thanks for the suggestion. If this continues I will check with her doctor about the anti-diarrheal. Big change as she has often needed the softeners in the past. No change in diet to pin this on, either, darn! What concerns me is she had no urge or cramping and took her by surprise. Glad your husband is able to remain active.
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GGsGirl, I've suffered from this on and off over the years. No urge, no warning, just an unstoppable force. I've been through tons of tests without resolution. I have another appointment with a different GI specialist next month. I call it IBS, but I'm not sure that is quite correct. I know it is a HUGE inconvenience and embarrassment factor!

I'm sure you are nice to your mother about this. She doesn't want it any more than you do!!

With dementia full incontinence is not unusual and that may be where this is headed. Meanwhile, talk to her doctor about minimizing the instances and the embarrassment factor for dear mom. Let us know if anything works well for you. We learn from each other.
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jeannegibbs, sorry you are dealing with this. Must be such an inconvenience. It has affected my mother only in the morning when she would normally go. Today was a repeat of yesterday, except she felt the urge to urinate - but not the other. She is fine the rest of the day - so far. Yes, she is soooo embarrassed, so I try to make little of it. At least I can get her into.the shower to clean up; normal bath time is evening, so I expected a fight. Of course it is the weekend so no doctor. Called the weekend nurse, but not much help. Adjusting diet so as not to irritate anything and keeping her hydrated. Hopefully this will straighten itself out, otherwise will be in touch with the doctor on Monday. Thanks and take care!
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