I have decided to block my Mom from any calls or texts for the third time this year. The toxic texts have been very hurtful. My husband has had my Mom on our plan for about 7 years now. She's 81 and lives independently and has an emotional support dog that used to be my dog for three years. I has taken her to the shelter (long story) and was emotionally distraught over it. My Mom took it upon herself to go there and adopt her. Fast forward, Bella the dog go better with meds and is thriving but is too much for my Mom to handle. I go through advice on training, correct collars, help buy food, baby sit, etc. Recently and for the second time my Mom has used Bella against me. She knows I am still the main master but won't admit to resentment. I still help. My Mom and I have always been close but we have had our struggles. I don't want to take her off our plan but feel it's time. She will leave a seriously nasty message and two days later send me a cute youtube video like everything is great. It's emotionally exhausting. Final straw. I always cave in, forgive,..until next time. I understand aging is difficult and I have my share of health problems. I see a holistic doctor once a week for everything imaginable and my Mom gets a clean bill of health with no sign of dementia just recently. Her apartment is loud and Bellas barking stresses her out but she would rather text me about it then take action. She's too concerned about housework and when her back flares up she complains but won't get a housekeeper (which is provided!). Damned if I do, or don't. Suffice to say, I have to block her and make her get her own phone. Anyone else have thoughts, prayers and advice please feel free to chime in. Please remember to be kind. Thank you.
Are you doing caregiving for your mother? Do you suspect dementia?
My mom gets tremendously jealous when her dogs want my attention, I let it go and ignore the dogs for the most part, it's not worth the fight.
Tell her that you are shutting her phone off as of the month end, don't leave her without a phone, that's not okay.
Then block her number on your phone and disengage from her BS. You don't have to talk to her, you don't have to read her texts and you don't have to see her. So don't!
I have an old wireless phone so not sure if landlines have the ability to block now. I had to block a friend after a nasty voicemail. I had no idea if and when she called. It was nice.
Are you going to the appointments with her and are privy to the outcome of the cognitive/memory exam directly from her doctor? Thanks for the extra info.