1 child has real estate power of attorney since she lives inn the same state as we do. I would like to have the 4 children on the power of attorney for all else. Is this wise? I don't want to slight them.
After what happened her, Mom gave both mdpoa and financial poa to one. If my Mom could understand the money that mistake caused her, she would be absolutely sick!
I plan on finding someone other than my children because of what has happened here. My mom did not want to give the poas to an attorney because of the cost. But it actually would have saved her alot of money.
A multi-pronged poa will cause nothing but trouble. Do not do it! If you can't decide amongst your children, then choose.a non-family member. All of the kids will then be equally miffed, but not at one of themselves.
Slighting your children should be your last concern, when considering who to give this most important, "powerful" and often irrevocable authority over yourself. My mother is suffering terrible from making that silly mistake, and in her lucid moments, cries and cries over that mistake, which she cannot fix.
ABSOLUTELY NOT! Choose one and stick to it. Choose the person the you trust will honor and fulfill your wishes. That might not be one of your children! This is the most important (and only) decision you will be making about how you will be treated and where you will be living, so make sure you get it right! You can solve a lot of sibling problems in advance by choosing someone else, too.
NO, nominate the closest, most responsible child as a DPOA. Multiple POA's turn into a real nightmare. Children are not always the best choice if there is conflict.
My sister recently took her MIL to update her will and draw up her poa's and was expressing her frustration to me. She also wanted to include all her children so "nobody would feel left out", even though one son said he didn't want any part of it and her daughters live too far away to take an active role. I think you need to understand that the one that is actually there and helping you is the one you should name, and it may even be a friend or cousin or DIL! Ultimately you must trust them to step up to make the final decisions about your finances or care as you would have done yourself if you were able. Your wishes won't be carried out if the family is fighting over what needs to be done or who should have the last word.
NO! You will guarantee many fights and squabbles if you put them all on as POAs. Pick one who is reasonable and who you trust and then a secondary one (in case something happens to the primary POA). You need to have one person who is responsible for making the decisions and if you have four people trying to agree on how things should be done it's a recipe for disaster.
If you have one child who has been more involved in your care and knows what you want done, then that's probably the right child to make POA. You should also put your wishes in writing and distribute to all of your children about what you want done if something happens to you. Do you want to be kept alive at all costs? Do you want a feeding tube? Do you want to be resuscitated in if your heart stops? If you're in a coma, do you want them to pull the plug? Those are the kinds of decisions your child might need to make on your behalf.
Just spend some time on this site reading about all of the fights/power struggles/hurt feelings that POAs can create.
I plan on finding someone other than my children because of what has happened here. My mom did not want to give the poas to an attorney because of the cost. But it actually would have saved her alot of money.
If you have one child who has been more involved in your care and knows what you want done, then that's probably the right child to make POA. You should also put your wishes in writing and distribute to all of your children about what you want done if something happens to you. Do you want to be kept alive at all costs? Do you want a feeding tube? Do you want to be resuscitated in if your heart stops? If you're in a coma, do you want them to pull the plug? Those are the kinds of decisions your child might need to make on your behalf.
Just spend some time on this site reading about all of the fights/power struggles/hurt feelings that POAs can create.