Grief...how to be strong for the survivor spouse/parent?

When adult children lose a parent they suffer their own pain. The remaining parent has lost a life partner. A spouse, often of many decades. Both situations generally mean there's plenty of grief to go around for everyone involved.

However, in these cases, the surviving spouse/parent is generally elderly and often frail. He or she may have lost the strongest emotional support they have and many of them have had their own friends die or else the friends are living with diseases of some type. They are less likely to have close friends they can talk with at length about their emotional pain.

To remain strong, you, the adult child, will have to admit your own suffering to yourself and to your parent. For strength, remind yourself of the frailty of your surviving parent and look to close friends for support. A grief support group may help, as well. Many people in the younger generations are more willing to go to a support group than their elders.

In the end, it's people who care about you who will get you through. Since you've not only lost a parent, but must shore up the remaining parent, you've got a huge load to bear. Please keep coming back to the site and also, look outward for support and friendship. You will make it a day at a time.
Take care,
Carol