I will start out by saying that I am 22 years old. My dad isn't where I need to take care of him but he is getting older. He'll be 64 in March. We think we started seeing his behavior get worse when he turned 60. He's always been sarcastic but lately it's gotten mean and pretty much the only way he'll respond. He treats my mother like dirt and when she tries to stick up for herself he makes her feel worse. Same thing with me and my sister. Just today he carried on an hour long argument for me not responding to one text message that was sent last night even though I responded to a second text message. Saying I "ignored it." A couple of weeks ago he asked me what time I was going to be in town to celebrate my mom's birthday and told him "hopefully by 6. Depending on the traffic." He then responded with a paragraph-long text about since I can't "make a commitment, he's just going to make the reservations without me." Even though I SAID I was going to be there. He just recently retired in May so he pretty much doesn't do anything all day so he expects my mom, me, whoever to be home at all times or if they aren't he constantly wants to know WHEN they will be home, WHAT they are doing. If my mom tries to say ANYTHING that he doesn't agree with, he accuses her of "arguing" with him. She can't stick up for herself because she's "arguing." He constantly accuses (my mother mostly) of "keeping things from him," "lying to him," "throwing him under the bus"- when all of that is so far from the truth it's crazy. He says he doesn't like "drama" yet he is always the one who starts it. He'll go to my 41 year old sister's house JUST to argue about how he thinks she should raise her daughter (who is 20 and lives on her own, by the way). He is making everyone in his life miserable but he doesn't see there is a problem. I've already researched all the different medications he takes to see if there is a behavior change as a side effect in those medications but to no avail. He has high blood pressure and he recently got diagnosed with diabetes, He kind of treats that like it's a joke also, he doesn't check his blood sugar as much as he should. He acts like HE'S right and the doctor is wrong or something by not doing it. I want to have some sort of behavior intervention but I don't know WHO to talk to, let alone if I did, he'd say we are "throwing him under the bus" again and then therefore be even meaner to my mother because she's the one who is with him all the time now. I live in a completely different city and my dad treats me like I'm 5. He treats my mom like she's his property or something and I have NO idea how to stop it. There isn't one day where he doesn't say some hurtful remark to my mom, me, my sister, or even my neighbor. He's not just treating his family like crap now, he's gone on to treating everyone that way. I guarantee if I were to try to tell him how I'm feeling, how EVERYONE feels, he'd say I'm being disrespectful. How am I supposed to stick up for myself and tell him that he hurts us if he's constantly going to bring me down in every response I make? It's always MY fault. It's always my mom's fault. It's NEVER his fault. How do I fix this? There HAS to be something neurologically wrong or SOMETHING dealing with his mind. I even recently graduated with a degree in Psychology and I have no idea how to even approach this situation. He hasn't always been like this. I used to LIKE going home, now I kind of hate it and I wouldn't if it weren't for my mom, friends back home, and my family dog. I just need advice on what to do. I'm so confused at this point that I don't even know where to start. I just don't want my mother to have to live her life being miserable because the way my dad treats her and not being able to say anything. My sister and I have an out because we live somewhere else but my mother doesn't. Life is too short to be mean and of all people who I thought would understand that, I thought my dad would. But apparently not. Is behavior intervention a good idea, bad idea? Can I even contact a geriatric psychiatrist for help seeing as I wouldn't ever get my dad to go because he doesn't see that anything is wrong? Can the geriatric psychiatrist give me advice even if I just email them?