So my friend Richard that I take care of has an adult son in his thirties with Autism. The son is high functioning but has his issues. Dad is now on safety quarantine due to age and health. Our entire state, CA, is under stay home unless needed orders. Son lives in the same building but not WITH Dad. How do we explain that he should not be wandering around, smoking a pack of cigarettes a day, coughing his lungs out, going to the grocery store for one bottle of soda at a time, and coming in and out of his dads apartment all day long? This has been his normal for the past year, but now it needs to stop. I am afraid he will get his dad and Me, sick.

Thank you. Problem is it is a very small studio apartment, so him even entering the door or standing in the kitchen still puts him way too close to his dad and I. He comes in multiple times a day to use the microwave, scrounge for csh or empty recyclables, beg me to drive him To the recycle center, etc. He has a key, his dad gave it to him thinking the boy would be able to come in and help if needed. I am not related nor married to his dad, so I can not just say " Give me your key and stay out".I will look at the autism link provided. his dad reminds him to shower if he stinks too bad so his concept of hygiene seems pretty limited.
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Reply to LS2234

No doubt changing his behaviour is going to be a long term project and not a simple fix, in the mean time try keeping the night latch on the door so that he at least has to knock to be admitted, then insist on his using sanitizer and removing his shoes before he enters. Give him a mask of some kind to wear if you can get him to do so without it becoming a physical struggle. Place limits on the areas of the apartment he can access.
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Reply to cwillie

There is a good website called Autism Speaks that might be helpful. Here is a link to their covid-19 page They also have a phone line for people seeking support.

As you likely know, a lot of people with Autism rely on routine as a tool to maintain their emotional balance. It will be very difficult for your step son to adjust to all of this. My heart goes out to you, you must feel at your wits end. I wish you all the best during these trying times.
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Reply to Tryingmybest

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