My aunt, in her 90's has a longtime friend and caregiver, "Kathy". She went into a nursing home 2 months ago. She began to tell me that Kathy had changed the locks on the house and would not give her key, that she was "taking all her things and spending all the money." Alarmed I went to visit. (Mind you she has not had any cognitive problems or dementia so I believed her.) I got the key to the house from Kathy and discovered the items my aunt had requested were gone: the TV and her jewelry. I found bank statements in the mailbox and Kathy is robbing her blind, clearly spending aunt's money on personal bills. And she had my aunt declared incompetent plus has power of attorney over her, so she's at her mercy.
I reported this to the police and adult protective services. They responded (!!) and are investigating. But my aunt is now saying it's all fine! I think she is mad at me for blowing the whistle.
Turns out Kathy isn't paying the nursing home bill so the home is filing in probate for a court appointed guardian. My aunt will be kicked out and most likely go to a very bad nursing home.
The ironic thing is that my aunt is not happy with me, the nursing home people think I'm a family member trying to take control and get the $$ and Kathy is telling my aunt bad things about me (which is kind of how she operates). I blew the whistle; now I'm the bad guy.
I just hope there is a good outcome. I don't think my aunt will ever recognize that Kathy has done anything wrong; sort of like someone abused identifying with and protecting the abuser.