My grandma passed away in December and we're supposed to have an unavailing between May and July. We haven't gone for a headstone yet because my aunt wants to have a say in what goes on the headstone. We were just going to have the same writing that is on my grandfather's stone. She's insisting that she be apart of the decision, meanwhile she wasn't even around when my grandma was on the decline. She chose going to Florida and going on a cruise rather than being with her mother in her final weeks. She even got mad at us for postponing the funeral as we awaited for her to make it up from Florida and her son come in with his family from California. She wasn't answering our calls and she was only talking to my uncle's wife who hardly had any details herself, then held onto them as an I know something you don't know type of deal. My mom and my other aunt already know that their sister and her husband aren't going to contribute any money to the stone, so why should we have to wait for her?
I want to go take care of the stone because I know this is not what my grandmother would have wanted. I already know there is conflict because my mom and aunt agree that the stone shouldn't say Great Grandmother because my grandma NEVER saw her Great Grandchildren.... My cousins always made excuses and my aunt never put her foot down to them trying to make them do the right thing. It's even only saying Grandma just because I was the only grandchild who cared about her.
Anybody have advice or have a similar situation that they could shed light on? I feel obligated to do right by my grandmother, and to me that's doing how it's always been... All decisions made by my aunt, mother and myself. My aunt and mother's older siblings wanted little to nothing to do with my grandmother while she was alive, why do they feel obligated to have a say in decisions surrounding her stone, and unavailing?