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She calls frequently for me to drive her to doctor and store. I helped out after her daughter had gallbladder surgery and could not drive for a month? Anyway I took her to physical therapy 2x per week, and I sat and waited, then she would want to go to the store (she shops slowly) so when I took her home she would give me $5 each time. Now she calls frequently asking for help. She goes on and on about her poor son is so busy working and planning his wedding, and her poor daughter has her own problems and can't help anybody else. She's on disability and sits home all day. My Aunt pinches pennies so she can leave her children money. I just got done being a live-in caregiver for my mother who passed, and got $0 for my trouble. I feel like I'm being taken advantage of. I need to get a backbone, and asked to get paid for helping. What is a fair price to ask for? Do I charge by the hour, or by the situation? Should that price include gas money? I could really use some advice. Thank you

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Hmmm. I would talk to my cousins and tell them that it is time to make arrangements for mom. Give them 2 weeks notice and tell your aunt that you are no longer available.

Yes, if she wants to pay you, go for it. But, You probably need $15.00 an hour, not $5.00 total.
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Unless your aunt offers to pay you to help her I wouldn't ask her for payment.

You don't have to turn your whole life over to caring for her. Take freqflyer's suggestion and set boundaries with your aunt.
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Ellie, if it was a non-relative, then yes broach the subject of paying... but that is hard to do with a close relative.

Instead, set boundaries, limit the number of trips and make the trip an one-stop only. I had to do that with my parents otherwise we would be all over hill and dale daily, going to 2 or 3 places each time.

With boundaries set, and with her son and daughter now knowing you can't be Mom's full-time chauffeur service, maybe then they will start helping out more.
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