My mom went from AL to memory care and the move was the best thing that they could do. She was such a lost soul in AL, refusing to come out of her room and not socializing unless they "forced" her too. Then she would wander into other residents rooms and get in trouble. She was so confused and lost. In MC it was a locked unit so she wasn't wandering off. They are tons of activities that were for people with MC issues. The staff kept a really good eye on her and she spent very little time in her room. I really wish she could still be there. She got so she was falling a lot and couldn't walk without sometimes 3 assist. Also extremely incontinent. So after a short stay in rehab it was off to LTC. They don't have near the activities and stimulation in LTC. Oh yes we didn't tell her it was MC. I just said they needed the room she was currently in for someone else and they had a better one for her on as different unit. Since the people in MC all were about the same as she was Memory wise she fit right in and made friends right away. Of course they all thought they were old friends from long ago but so what. I found the conversations to be different but never would argue or correct anyone.
When my mother was moved from the Skilled Nursing floor to the Memory Care Unit, she really was not aware where she was moving to. She had changed rooms more than once on the SNF floor due to her combativeness with roommates, so this was just one more move to her. She thought the locked doors were for everyone else and I did not dissuade her from this belief. I didn’t make a big deal out of the move. I didn’t explain that she had to move into the locked unit because she had gotten worse. The move was accomplished quickly and matter-of-factly. Let the staff handle any anxiety issues. Make sure all her things are moved with her.
A woman at my bro's assisted living was moved to the memory care cottages. They all of course wanted to visit her and it wasn't allowed for 30 days. At first they would see her at the windows looking out across the gardens and it was said, given she loved to walk and was excellent on her feet, that she went to the door all the time. But once the 30 days were up and they could visit she seemed quite happy there. She loved to talk, and she could just talk and talk there and everyone seemed not tired of repetitive stories. So I hope it will be a good adjustment. It is painful to see and worry about. I hope it goes well. Let us know. Do try to take their suggestions to allow her to adjust without you a bit. They will let you know if this isn't working well.
Wow that's terrible that they wouldn't allow visitors for 30 days. I don't think I could go along with that. O would agree to not taking them out or having shortened visits but not none at all. I think by me coming in it reassured my Mom and when my Dad went to LTC it helped him adjust better. too.
My mother went from AL into their Memory Care building this past May, after living in AL for 5 years. She had quite a cognitive decline with her dementia, but also a physical decline having become wheelchair bound after suffering a stroke & a stint in the hospital & rehab. She is 92, and with moderate dementia, one of the more lucid of the crowd of 24 in her MC. So, she calls the others 'stupid morons' and other ugly names, right to their faces, so that's not a good thing. She's not thrilled being in MC and wants to go back to the regular Assisted Living apartment she'd had, but that's not possible. She had gotten SO bad in AL, that they were needing to ask her to leave about 6 months prior, but were feeling badly b/c she'd been there for so long. So no, she can't go back and has to stay put where she is, or else go to Skilled Nursing.
None of these moves are 'easy' on the elders, or on US, frankly. My mother also suffers from very high anxiety and OCD tendencies along with the dementia, so she has zero tolerance for discomfort or aggravation/imperfection/mistakes of any kind. Makes for a tough situation for all concerned, really.
FYI, my mother's Memory Care has NONE of the no visiting rules AlvaDeer is suggesting at her brother's place. None. I wouldn't stand for it anyway, even if they did have such rules in place! I'd NEVER not visit my mother or father for a 30 day period and just feel confident the care staff was doing their job. I oversee EVERYTHING that goes on (and that went on) with both of my folks when they were in the hospital, in rehab, in Assisted Living, and now in Memory Care. All elders should have an available advocate who's on top of their care at all times, in my opinion.
Wishing you all the best of luck with the move and I hope your mom acclimates quickly.
None of these moves are 'easy' on the elders, or on US, frankly. My mother also suffers from very high anxiety and OCD tendencies along with the dementia, so she has zero tolerance for discomfort or aggravation/imperfection/mistakes of any kind. Makes for a tough situation for all concerned, really.
FYI, my mother's Memory Care has NONE of the no visiting rules AlvaDeer is suggesting at her brother's place. None. I wouldn't stand for it anyway, even if they did have such rules in place! I'd NEVER not visit my mother or father for a 30 day period and just feel confident the care staff was doing their job. I oversee EVERYTHING that goes on (and that went on) with both of my folks when they were in the hospital, in rehab, in Assisted Living, and now in Memory Care. All elders should have an available advocate who's on top of their care at all times, in my opinion.
Wishing you all the best of luck with the move and I hope your mom acclimates quickly.