My grandparents are 85 and 86. My grandmother receives SSI and Medicare my grandfather is an Army veteran and receives some retirement from the state and Medicare. They both have dementia, grandmother has had it longer and has taken meds to help with the symptoms (Aricept) but now my grandfather is showing symptoms of dementia/confusion and it progressing very fast. They both have health issues (high blood pressure, diabetes, anemia, heart disease, etc.) and have to take medication and of course watch their diet. With this last instance my grandmother went into the hospital (bilateral pulmonary embolism) my grandfather seemed to get even more confused and distracted (which we assume due to my grandmother being ill). My grandfather is the primary caregiver of my grandmother. She's not very mobile, he cooks, cleans, reminds her to take her meds, take her to her appointments, etc. I will help with appointments and go home every weekend so that he can have a break and clean, cook and run errands for them. Now I don't trust that he can care for the both of them as safely as he did just months ago.
In short, sorry for the long message; I want to know what can we do? I want to make sure they get their meals, medications are taken and managed, get to all their appointments, and of course are safe in their home (i.e. forgetting to leave the stove on, etc.). I live and work an hour and 1/2 away. My mom, aunt and uncle live close by but don't visit them as often or consistently. Do you know of any resources that I should seek out to get them assistance. I'm afraid they won't be able to live at home (alone) for much longer, safely with out having someone come in to assist them, me quitting my job and moving back home, or moving them into an assisted living facility (which is not a welcome option for either of them at this time).
Is there anyone else who has experienced this?
This is very overwhelming and I don't know what to do, but am afraid to do anything for fear of making a bad decision or making their situation even worse.