I am 52 and live near my elderly parents. Mom is 86 and dad is 91. I believe dad has late stage dementia. He needs 24/7 supervision and care. It is too much for mom but she has been doing it for years. We have a doctor appointment for my dad on Monday where it will probably be recommended AGAIN that he be placed in skilled nursing.
Mom is extremely passive and highly anxious and cannot advocate for herself or him. So I have to go to the doctor with them. This is hard for me as I must take time off work, and it is a very busy time for me.
None of us 5 kids has POA. I don’t want to be POA. My sister was named executor and thinks she is POA. I have tried to explain the difference to my siblings to no avail.
My sister who is executor has not been for a visit in over five years. I have another sister who visits regularly and a brother who visits quite often.
The legal docs were drawn up after I had a mental illness episode, brought partly on by caring for my parents. I do not want to go through this again.
Oh and by the way my parents have in no way planned for any long term care.
Does anyone have any advice?
Go to your County Social Service office and see what kind of help is available. Your Office of Aging maybe able to help too.